Thought Catalog
April 12, 2017

It’s Time To Walk Away From The Guy Who Makes You Feel Like You Have To Prove Yourself

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What is the issue?
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I was holding out hope for you. Wishing that you would change your mind. I thought you would give this a chance. These same three thoughts were on repeat for months.

But, you won’t change your mind and you won’t give this a chance.

I’ve wasted countless of hours, days, and weeks trying to prove to you that I am one of those “cool” girls that everyone says they want to date.

Do you know how exhausting it is trying to show someone how cool and awesome you are?

How crazy is that statement – you have to prove to someone you are cool and awesome in order for them to like you? Do you know that you don’t have to prove anything to anyone at any point in your life?

In fact, why would you want to be with someone that you have to prove yourself to?

You have to remind yourself: you are already awesome, cool, brilliant, beautiful, strong, kind, and funny – without even trying or proving it to anyone. It’s your natural being. That is who you are and you don’t need any man to tell you otherwise.

I should have listened to my gut a long time ago when this thought first crossed my mind: you don’t care about me the way I care about you.

All of the signs were there, except they weren’t. There were moments and subtle glimmers of hope that seemed as if you were going to change your mind.

I should have known better based on your patterns. Nothing ever happened. Everything stayed the same as it’s always been. You’re still doing your own thing, while I’m holding out hope that one day you will see what you are missing.

All I can say now is that I am done.

It takes up too much time and too much energy. It drains you like a Dementor in Harry Potter. It just sucks the life out of you because you know in the end that nothing will ever happen.

Do you know how draining it is to like someone who you know will never feel the same way?

The person who is supposed to love me is going to love all of me, for exactly how I am. There will be no proving, no showing off – just the real, raw authentic me. And you know what? He’s going to love every piece of me.

So, to all the woman out there who have struggled the same way I have, you can stick around and hope that he’ll somehow miraculously change his stubborn mind. But you don’t want to be with someone who is too scared to love all of the awesomeness that you are. TC mark