October 11, 2016

10 Beautifully Simple Reminders That Will Help You Make Peace With Your Drifting Friendships

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Brooke Cagle
Brooke Cagle

1. Transitions are a part of finding your place.

You will always be in transition. From one job to another, from school to work, from one city to the next, from one way of thinking to a new one as you grow—transitions are a part of life. Though it may feel like the other half of you is missing, this transition is a part of life, and what lies ahead is far better than what lies behind.

2. Change is necessary for growth.

You are becoming. Right now, in this moment of change, you are slowly molding into the person you are supposed to be, and as scary as this is, it’s wonderful, too. For whatever reason, this past friendship isn’t making it into your new life, but hold on, because change is the only constant, and whatever change is coming will help you grow.

3. Nothing is ever permanent.

You have drifted from this best friend, from this person who has defined you and been by your side for so long. It’s terrifying, and I know you’re wondering whether things will ever be the same. No one knows that, but you can find comfort in the fact that what is happening right now won’t always be happening. Perhaps you will grow apart, perhaps you will grow together. Only time will tell.

4. Best friends will always have a place in your heart.

No matter the miles, the time, or emotional distance between two best friends, if your relationship was true, you will always stay friends, even from afar. The way the relationship feels might change over time, but the initial connection will always be a part of you both.

5. What falls apart will come together, and vice versa.

This is the ebb and flow of life—that things come together and then separate and return back together again. There is no way to tell how these things will happen, when they will happen, or even if they will for sure, but know that love is the strongest bond shared between humans. And love is always there.

6. Goodbyes are never permanent.

You might have drifted slowly, it might have been a fight, or a clearly stated separation. But whatever has pulled you two apart doesn’t have to be the end of a relationship. Things may have changed, but a reconnection is always a phone call, a coffee date, or a deep talk away.

7. One person cannot be your crutch; you can stand on your own.

This may have been the relationship that saved you, but now you are strong enough to walk, to run, to fight back. Always remember this person as someone who stood by your side at your lowest, but now move forward on your own with confidence and pride.

8. Sometimes beautiful things die to allow even more beautiful things to grow.

Sometimes relationships bless us for a period of time and then they pass. Never forget them. Keep them close to your heart and savor those precious memories. But also know that the future brings even better and more stable relationships.

9. You should not hold on to people who want to be let go of.

Perhaps there is a reason why your friend has drifted, a reason that has not yet been explained to you. Remember that you cannot grasp on to what doesn’t want to be held. Let go of this person and you will not only free him/her, but also yourself.

10. Every painful moment is a masked blessing.

This hurts, I know it does. But remember that even though this friendship is ending and your heart is breaking, you will learn from the pain. You will learn resilience, you will learn strength, you will learn who you are when you are no longer attached at the hip to this other person. You will grow, sweet thing. You will learn and grow. TC mark

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