I know nothing of life. Just like you, we both make bad decisions, we regret it after, we promise not to do it again, and then just like any other fools in the world – we repeat it. We’re just constantly circling in this vicious cycle of mistakes, forgiveness, and letting go.
I know you’re having a bad time. We all are, aren’t we? You think you’re the unluckiest human being out there. The dumbest of all dumbs. You think you’re in the lowest part of life. Unable to crawl back up again. You think that no one else in this world is having a hard time, or that no one is having it as hard as you have it. You may be right. And I’m not going to invalidate what you feel. I’m not going to force you to feel better just because somewhere in this world there are famished children, fighting for war, losing their loved ones or battling with a disease. Dealing with pain should never be a competition. And there is no winning with hurting and pain to begin with.
I’m not going to question your unconventional ways of healing. We all have different ways of coping. Maybe I’m just lucky that I have an unshakable faith for silver linings in my life.
All I can do for you is give you a little faith and a pinch of hope. I’m not going to promise you that things will be better. Or that tomorrow is a sunny day. I don’t want to recite to you the clichè quotes we all find online, because I don’t want to disappoint you.
All I can hope for is this: I hope you meet a good friend along the way that will help you out of the labyrinth of sufferings. I hope, while you’re wallowing in self pity and your playlist is on shuffle, that a good song comes on and saves you. That the lyrics and the melody rush through your heart and make it beat again. I hope that while you’re finding yourself in a crowded place of robotic people, that you’ll come across a book in an old bookshop that will change your views in your life. Something that will speak to you as if it is living within you.
I hope you find those little things as enough reasons to stand still. I hope you’ll become your own anchor.
Life is hard. That’s how it is. You just have to fight and deal with it. You’re a badass hidden behind the problems of the world.
You’re larger than those demons that swallow you at night.
Take it all, let it seep in, and then breathe. You are existing. The stabbing pain through your chest is just a proof that you feel something. A proof of your existence. A heart that could be passionate. Hang in there.