This Is What You Should Really Do After Being Played

I’ve always taken that leap of faith when it came to relationships.

Will it work out? Will it not work out? Will it work out but soon fail?

In the end, nobody really knows unless we try it out for ourselves. Grasping that uncertainty, we close our eyes, hold our breaths and dive into our unknown fate. With great risks, lies greater rewards as well as even greater consequences. So what happens, when we end up facing these consequences of getting played?

Honestly, it’s hard to know that all you’re left with are empty promises, transient memories and the thought of ‘what could have been’. After investing your time and emotion into believing something, it’s natural to feel shortchanged with things don’t work out. And at the end of the day, you realise no amount of complaining, ranting or crying makes you feel better. And you ask yourself,

Why like this? Why now? Why me?

Personally, I always thought the worst part was that nothing could make me feel better. I though closure was all I needed but in the end the only closure I needed was from myself. The closure that everything really is over and is but a short page in the story of my life. The closure is really in knowing that I am ready for my next, more exciting chapter. So what to do reach this point?

All it takes is letting go and waiting.

Easier said than done, I know. We’ve all been there. Feeling that you’ve finally let go but then you scroll through your movies and see that movie y’all wanted to watch together or pass by that spot that y’all always met at, and BAM everything just floods back. The key thing to note for this, is that you can never let it all go. Because when you get involved in something, you’re giving a little piece of yourself to them an it’s something you’ll never be able to take back. So yes. You can let go of the expectations, spitefulness and the thought that he/she was different from the rest.

I mean after all what’s done can’t be undone. But in the end, you can’t totally forget that that person was very much a part of your life. A part that made you smile at a simple text or laugh till your sides hurt. Keep that. Keep the thoughts that you felt that way once, and can feel it again but with the right person. Keep the memories of how everything started to unravel, and use it next time to your advantage. Learn not to get played again. Learn how to spot the player.

Essentially, all I am saying is forgive. Hating won’t make anyone feel better.

Just forgive and let go.

But keep what you have learnt from this relationship and don’t let it happen again. Hence, you wouldn’t have wasted your time. Because you come out knowing you have improved yourself. You come out a better and improved version of yourself. And that itself is something worthwhile.

Lastly, just wait.

Wait for the feelings to pass. Wait for the right person to come, he/she will come one day.

Just don’t rush or force anything because if something is yours, it’ll be yours. Be a better person today, start a new hobby or focus on something you enjoy and wait.

Because you’ll know when the right person comes, he/she was worth the wait.