20 Things White People Always Get Wrong About Life
1. Treating Halloween as the unique occasion to dress up as another race!
2. Posting pictures of themselves in developing countries with children of other ethnicities because their like one service trip turned them into global ambassadors. The reality is that they’re using those kids and those pictures to make themselves saints.
3. Drinking milk with meals that aren’t breakfast. I mean a glass of milk with a bowl of chili? Really?
4. Always asking about white people. I was at a conference recently and the panel I attended was about black popular culture. Not one but TWO white guys raised questions that were basically like, “Well, what about white people?” It is about white people all the time!!! Can we have this like 90-minute panel, please?
5. That it is a good idea to be the first to “go check out what that sound was” or do dangerous things like playing with scary animals. Uh, no.
6. Saying racist things to other white people, either without knowing they’re doing it OR thinking that the implicated white person will understand where they are coming from.
7. Thinking that all black or brown people are so poor that they couldn’t possibly afford to purchase an expensive belt or handbag in an exclusive department store without using a stolen/fake credit card. Like the 19 year old black kid who recently bought a belt at Barneys and a person at the store got so freaked out that they sent police out to detain him. The police literally asked him how he could afford a $300+ belt and then arrested him. REALLY?
8. When white guys get cornrows because they are trying to prove that they are bout it bout it I guess?
9. Going apeshit with their front lawns on the decoration tip.
10. Turning everything into a casserole.
11. Seasoning things with just salt and pepper. Get creative with it, white people! The first white guy I ever dated was so surprised by how flavorful chicken could be. I couldn’t get him to eat chicken because he said his parents didn’t do anything to it. Now, I am not Chef Boyardee or what have you but I did get him to like chicken.
12. Telling a person of color that they speak so well.
13. Or better yet, asking any brown person in the store if they “work there.”
14. Using the phrase “we should just people based on their character and not on their skin color.” No.
15. That it is a good idea to walk around BAREFOOT out in society.
16. Changing the side of the street they’re walking on/clutch their bag if they a black or brown person is on approach.
17. That it is a good idea to touch ethnic hair with or without asking.
18. That white beauty is the only kind of beauty.
19. Not realizing that white privilege is a thing.
20. That it is still a good idea to cast movies, fashion editorials, catwalks and television shows with just white people. Real talk.
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2. You get separation anxiety.
There’s nothing worse than the person who pretends to wear their heart on their sleeve when they actually have an ace up it.
Be the envy, not the envier. You can’t find yourself in other people.
3. The smiling poop.