White Guys REALLY Like Asian Girlz, Apparently
So last night I’m on Facebook and one of my friends posts a music video for a song called “Asian Girlz” by Day Above Ground, some band I’ve never heard of, and the only reason I watch the video is because my friend’s caption was like:
WTF? No…just no. No…one of the most disgustingly racist and sexist things I’ve ever seen or heard…and I’ve seen and heard a lot of crap. I don’t get why the actress dances in the video…
One of the most racist and sexist things ever seen? Okay so now I have to watch. I’m not really expecting to be shocked off my ass because pretty much everything is racist or sexist in some way. I’m chill. The video starts cool, with some light Asian framing symbols, I get it, it’s all cool. But the shit hits the fan as soon as that “ching chong” stereotypically AZN sound chimes in — you know the one.
And then they start serenading the Asian girl of their dreams
“Asian Girl/She’s my Asian Girl.”
“I love your sticky rice/butt fucking all night.”
Well butt fucking is a perfectly normal activity. Nothing racist or Asian-specific here!
Sticky rice though?
“I love your creamy yellow thighs/Your slanted eyes.”
Oh, um, ok…Getting slightly more racist.
“Now it’s the year of the dragon/Ninja pussy I’m stabbing.”
You know, in our age of constant media stimulation you have to have a pretty huge rock to drop for anybody to pay you any attention. And here we all are, talking about a music video from a band nobody has ever heard of. So that’s why part of me wonders whether or not this video was a joke maybe? That it’s a parody, that it is obviously not a real thing because, like, racism and all of that?
The truth of it though is that white guys really do like Asian chicks — it is sort of a thing. Just see the above video, a real parody of Shit White Guys Say To Asian Girls.
We all have our dating preferences or types we are into, even if they are problematic. I for instance am really attracted to tall skinny creative white guys, and I know it is problematic! But there’s a difference between having a type or types and fetishizing an entire ethnic group for shits and giggles, especially when brown bodies have long been fetishized for small pussies, big dicks, big asses, you know the story.
That’s why I’m not so sure “Asian Girlz” could even be a parody. It’s a bad one at the very least. These bros seem super serious about their love for AZN girls, like it doesn’t seem like they are making fun of themselves. They really think “midget pussy” is the bomb. A parody is supposed to teach us something new, to show us the ridiculousness of things. So what are we learning here?
A | A | A
You were a founding figure in the “adorkable” movement.
I always imagined as I grew old and desperate I would become less picky when it came to qualifications for men. Strangely enough, I’ve experienced the opposite. Consider the Erica of age 18.
I love the internet. It’s a wonderful place to discover new artists and talented writers and cats playing with yarn. But lately, it’s getting me a little down.
1. Wrapping Paper There is nothing, nothing, worse than running out of wrapping paper. In some cases, you have to resort to covering your family’s treasured retail items in newspaper. “Positively gauche, father,” your son will say.