Would You Like To Be On The Reality TV Version of ‘Girls’?
Have you ever been freaked out that maybe you got an STD because of all the stuff that gets up around the sides of condoms — what about that stuff? Have you ever done some messed up stuff in a relationship, like date a guy who you didn’t really like or were maybe falling out of love with but as soon as you broke up with him and saw him with someone else you realized, Holy shit, I want him back. Then you do everything to get him back and when you finally get him, during the middle of the reunion sex you say, “I want to break up.” Is that the story of your life?
Well now you can get your Hannah/Marnie on in a brand new Girls-like reality TV series that’s casting RIGHT NOW in New York! An “Emmy Winning Production Company” — ooo the suspense — placed an ad on Craigslist looking for cultured Ivy Leaguers/Liberal Arts college people to take their clothes off, have weird sex and get fired from their jobs at art galleries or what have you for this new show. Could be good, could be a hot mess, but it’s reality TV so you know that at least you’ll be famous enough to be a guest on Wendy Williams.
It was only a matter of time before Lena Dunham’s hilarious portrayal of four twentysomethings trying to make it through love and life in New York City got its own reality TV version. Of course, this isn’t the first time that a scripted television show became a reality show. Desperate Housewives gave birth to The Real Housewives franchise. The thing is, the reason everybody loves Girls is because it already feels so real. We know that reality TV is pretty much all scripted anyway, so what could a “reality” version add? What would you want to see in the reality TV version of Girls? I know one thing, I’m not too sure how this kind of show would work without all the raunchy sex scenes. “It was like 3 pumps — like 2 and a half pumps. And then I lost my boner.” Can’t say that on Lifetime !
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It started with a right swipe, a little green heart. Tinder of course.
Though I acknowledge and appreciate the differences in human experiences, and while your heartbreak is (and always will be) uniquely and completely your own, I must urge you to consider that I have been where you are.
With his hat cocked back, body tilted away from his cane, and right forefinger pointing directly at his audience, Joseph Ducreux commands the attention of those viewing his self-portrait.
I was born in 1990; he was born in 1973. I’m 23; he just turned 40.