Thought Catalog
November 7, 2012

The Hottest TV Dads

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Dads are so hot. They’re more rugged, they know how to do shit, and they’ve been through the world enough to know what they want and how to get it. There’s something sexy about having a kid and being committed to your family while also being REALLY HOT, especially if you’re a young dad. Young hot dads are the best, and young hot dads on TV are even better. TV dads warm our hearts and show us the way family is supposed to be. They help us sift through all the growing pains and moral issues that every family is faced with, but that doesn’t mean we should want to sleep with them any less! Here are a few of the hottest TV DILFs, not that I have a daddy fetish or anything…because I don’t.

Mitch Leery, Dawson’s Creek

Dawson’s Creek

Didn’t you fantasize about your substitute teacher slash guidance counselor slash football coach when you were in high school? I mean, I would sure be fantasizing about substitute teacher Leery during homeroom, like drawing hearts around his name in my Lisa Frank Trapper Keeper and stuff. You know you have a hot daddy when you walk in on your parents trying to get it in, like in that episode where Gail calls Mitch “Mr. Man Meat” which, let’s be real, kind of sounds like the title of an awesome gay daddy porn. Deep dimples and He-Man broad shoulders will make anybody drop the panties/boxer shorts in no time.

Rufus Humphrey, Gossip Girl

Gossip Girl

Rufus Humphrey is such a hipster dad, and hipster dads are like the hottest dads there are IMHO. They might be older, but that doesn’t mean they have all their youth and hipness sucked out of them. This daddy used to play in a rock band, he’s got an art gallery, plus he’s so edgy and cool he lives in a loft. Wow. Also? Dan Humphrey. Dan Humphrey is so hot. I’m sure I’m not the only person who watched Gossip Girl merely for the Humphrey boys. A daddy-son three-way? Anyone?

Danny Tanner, Full House

Full House

Danny Tanner was a hot (though totally unhip) dad because he was tall and has a superb set of dimples. He was conventionally attractive, sure, but that’s not why he was hot. He was hot because he was a nerd, and people love hot nerds. He made you smile with all his quirks like asking you not to come into the house with dirty shoes or when he would actually clean his cleaning products. The only thing that would really get strange, though, is if every time you proposed some new kinky thing in the bedroom he delicately touched your knee, tilted his head, and told you you how immoral it was, that he wasn’t going to do it, with some sudden slow moralizing music coming out of nowhere.

Sam Bennett, Private Practice

Private Practice

Um, it’s Taye Diggs.

Frank Lambert, Step By Step

Step by Step

Frank Lambert is the guy-next-door dad that all the soccer moms in the cul-de-sac secretly hope is on Ashley Madison. Frank isn’t as sexualized as some of the other TV dads are, but it’s ABC so you can’t really ask for much. Plus he’s got a head full of hair and at that age, a nice full head of hair is hard to come by! The one thing that stands out about this TV dad, though, is that his pants are so tight and hiked up so high that his moose knuckles could burst through at any moment.

Jax Teller, Sons of Anarchy

Sons of Anarchy

Bad guys are so hot. Long hair. Tatts. Motorcycles. What is it about danger that turns us on so much? Or I guess maybe it’s just me, maybe I should just stop projecting. The whole point of Jax’s role on the show is that he has to shift between his role as a dad and his role in the Sons of Anarchy. But all that stuff takes a second seat to all the hot sex and shower scenes on the show, which is how you know the producers take the marketing of his sexiness very seriously. Hottest bad-ass dad on TV, pants down.

Philip Banks, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

I like my dads young and height and weight proportionate, but I know some people like a little something extra. Philip Banks was a hot dad because a bougie dad is automatically a hot dad because he has things like healthcare and in-home tennis courts. Plus, he was ultimately loving and caring, and no matter what happened, at the end of the day he was there for you.

George Altman, Suburgatory

Suburgatory

Look, another hipster dad! George Altman is like a combo of the cool hipster-y-ness of Rufus Humphrey crossed with the quirky, cluelessness of Danny Tanner. He’s like if Danny Tanner wore leather jackets from A.P.C.

Max Sheffield, The Nanny

The Nanny

Mr. Sheffield was so hot. He was rich, stable, and had a head full of hair. Plus, what’s better than a British accent?

David Murray, The New Normal

The New Normal

Are people with dark hair and blue eyes always this good looking? As if being attractive wasn’t enough, the hottest dads are like superheroes because they always have fabulous houses, perfect bodies, flawless skin, and six figure incomes. I know David is not quite a dad yet, but he’s about to be plus he’s so delicious even in this pre-dad state, so whatever. When I see Daddy David I can tell his mouth is moving and I know he’s talking but I don’t hear anything because I’m too busy making out with my television set.

Sandy Cohen, The O.C.

The O.C.:

It’s all about the eyebrows, baby.

Eric Camden, 7th Heaven

7th Heaven

I know what you’re thinking — how can you put a Protestant minister on a list of hot TV dads! People always have kinks, no matter how much time they devote to talking about sinful act of pre-marital sex, which nobody should have under any circumstances. The thing is, there’s something hot about a conservative daddy who has given himself over to the Lord because all you can think about are the various ways you can corrupt him. Corruption is the fun part! TC mark