July 22, 2016

23 People Share Their Horny Accounts Of Joining The Mile High Club (And Tell How They Got Away With It)

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AviEye / www.twenty20.com/photos/2ec77434-a28b-4dce-b3ee-c9ea360d6139
AviEye / www.twenty20.com/photos/2ec77434-a28b-4dce-b3ee-c9ea360d6139

1. The Perfect Crime

Eight hours into the thirteen hour flight from JFK to Dubai. After that much time in the air, the FAs are taking a break and most of the people are sleeping. The bigger “handicapped” lavatory is up near the flight deck of the A380. She walked into the lavatory and left the door unlocked. I waited a few minutes and then followed her in. After cleaning up, I walked out and she followed a couple minutes after that. The perfect crime.

2. Busted AF

One of the most mortifying moments of my life was getting caught doing this. My gf at the time and I really wanted to try, so we booked seats on a redeye, thinking no-one would pay us any mind. She went into the bathroom, and I joined her a minute later. I go in, and since we have been whispering about it and thinking about it for weeks I am hard and she is wet. I put it in and BAM BAM BAM the fucking stewardess is banging on the door and saying “Come out right now! I know what you are doing in there!” We look at each other in horror and I instantly lose my erection. We button ourselves up and skulk out to major stinkeye from everyone sitting nearby (several people were woken up by the stewardess banging on the door/yelling). Had to sit through the rest of the flight with blue balls and extreme shame. The stewardess pointed us out to the captain as we were getting off the flight. 1/5 would not repeat.

3. On The Red Eye

Red-eye flight. It was before 9/11 happened so flight crews weren’t nearly as vigilant. Lights went out. Everyone around us was asleep. We were spooning under a large blanket and she lifted up her skirt. Achievement unlocked.

4. Planning Ahead

I told the flight staff before boarding my gf at the time needed help using the rest room because of personal issues. I also informed them we are highly embarrassed about it since on our last flight the crew made a huge deal when we were seen going in together(which is a lie). Near the end of the flight we slipped off into the bathroom and went at it. We’re both pretty small and it was a very hard maneuver to pull off. However it was awesome at the same time. It was hard hiding back a huge grin walking out.

5. “Gastric Bypass”

I feigned a disability and my wife accompanied me into the handicapped toilet on the plane 4 times during the 5 hour flight. Each time she apologized and said it would be either very quick or very long. We went in and made out a bit 3 times for never longer than 2 minutes and I came out gobbled. Then with about an hour to go my wife told the steward, “so sorry dear, this is the one, maybe 15 minutes while I help him with his post dinner bowel movement and cleanup.”

We fucked for about 15 minutes and the noise was attributed to my gastric bypass. Best blowjob and doggy style ever.

6. SUPER OBVIOUS

Got a blow job on a plane. We were in two seats on the aisle and her head was under a blanket. SUPER OBVIOUS. She only did it for around 5 minutes until too many people started to look. No one bothered to say anything because I guess what would you say.

7. “It Was Fucking Awesome”

I was on my way to Madrid with my then girlfriend, sophomore year in high school, and we sat together in a row of 2 seats on the far right. To the left there was a middle row of 5 seats and a left row of 3. She surprised me by taking a nap on my lap and then proceeding to pull down my pants and blow me. This was extremely awkward for me because the chaperone was sitting directly to the left and behind us. I was so damn paranoid the whole time that people could hear the sucking or see her head moving under the blanket. Hell they probably did. It was fucking awesome though. Minus me trying to finagle my way to the lavatory without getting my victory sauce all over the pants I would be in the rest of the flight.

8. Juices Flowing

My gf at the time and I were very close and comfortable, so when I took her up north to meet my family, I kind of joked around about the subject to plant the seed of thought, inception style. I was working at a Marriott and had snatched a few mini liquor bottles for the flight. A half hour into the flight we each had one shot, which was apparently enough to get our juices a-flowin’. She got up for the bathroom, and I followed a healthy five minutes later, real inconspicuous-like. It was really fast and super hot, got her from behind over the sink and was done in like a minute. We decided it was best to not dawdle afterward, and she got out first, and I followed about a minute later. The flight attendant nearby noticed and said, rather defeatedly, “Come on, guys, really?” Sat back down, watched Batman Begins, didn’t hear another word about it for the rest of the flight. God damn I miss that girl…

9. Mile High And Mile Low

I did this with a very horny but crazy Ex on a college trip to Europe. We were on a busy daytime flight from NY to England. We decided to wait until the flight attendants were busy serving lunch so no one was in the back area where they prepare everything. I went first and told her to meet me a few minutes later and knock. Getting in wasn’t a problem. She was a very petite girl so it wasn’t difficult to have sex doggy style. We quietly, quickly got to it and finished. Everything went great, I even got to watch myself in the mirror for a bit. Only problem was I heard a woman waiting for the bathroom. I thought quickly, got myself together and told my girlfriend to wait a few minutes to leave. I stepped out of the bathroom, closed the door turn to the woman and said, “I took the nastiest dump ever in there. You might want to wait a few minutes. its really bad”. This sweet brunette lady in her forties looked at me laughed and said, “thanks for the warning” and decide to go to another bathroom.

I don’t know about you but if a complete stranger has the courtesy to warn you about the onslaught of shit smell they themselves are responsible for you believe them. I sat back down, my ex met me a moment later and no one was the wiser. I’m sure if we had worse timing this wouldn’t be as successful. That story wouldn’t have work if multiple people were waiting. This is also the same trip I later had sex with her in the Chunnel train on the way to France. The Chunnel is the underground tunnel that runs beneath the English Channel. So I like to tell people I’m in the Mile High/Mile Low Club when the topic comes up. I wonder how many people are in that club? Man that girl was crazy. Who the fuck decided to have a fight in Paris!? “JESUS CHRIST WOMAN!! THIS IS THE CITY OF ROMANCE!!!”, was my favorite quote from that trip.

10. Scotland To Chicago

Transatlantic overnight flight from Scotland to Chicago. When they turned the cabin lights down we went to the back bathroom about a minute apart.

11. Flesh Eating Bacteria

I thought I had gotten away with it, and then I was diagnosed with a flesh eating bacteria on my bum shortly after picking up my luggage at the baggage claim. Coach class bathrooms are bacteria fuck fests.

12. The Crew Does It Too

I used to be a flight attendant. On a flight if a pilot has to pee he comes out, and a flight attendant replaces him/ her in the flight deck for safety. I discovered that the first officer took a pee break on one of my flights so the captains lover/ my co flight attendant could go up front and bang him. They were sly and I had no clue.

13. A True Thrill Seeker

Long flight from China to the US, girlfriend and I just got up and went into the bathroom together. A went down on her until she came, turned her around and went in doggy style. Finished and went back to our seats. If anyone noticed, nobody said anything.

Also had sex in a train lavatory and in a taxi. The taxi driver was happy to watch.

In addition to many blowjobs, also had sex in a cinema. Lifted the armrest and spooned her in our seats. We were sitting in the back and the cinema was half … I’m gonna say half full.

Also, had sex on the Great Wall of China just after sunset.

14. Looking Back, It Was Really Obvious

Study abroad trip to Europe junior year of high school with about 10 class mates including my girlfriend. Incredibly long flight, I finger banged her there and back and she gave me a couple handjob to blowjob. She ended up leaving her wet panties inside the magazine pocket of the seat. Looking back it was incredibly obvious what was going on and I still wonder about who found those panties and what their reaction was.

15. The True Origin Of Autopilot

The pilot didn’t mind turning on autopilot.

16. Tips From A Pro

The trick I found was moderately-sized daytime flights. Many people think they should do overnight flights but the crews are usually sizable and you’re likely to get caught.

Try a 2-hour flight with only 3 flight attendants. One will be up in 1st class, and then the other two both have to do the drink service in coach. Sit near the back of the plane – as soon as they go toward the front of the plane with the drink cart you have about 20 min to get busy…

(I also brought in a bottle of aloe gel so I could b.s. an excuse about needing help reaching a sunburn on my back if we did end up being caught.)

17. Birthday Over The Atlantic

Was flying back to the States from London. I had the window seat, cute girl was sitting in the middle, and we had a really fat guy in the aisle seat (originally I was supposed to be in the aisle seat but I swapped with him because he apparently needed the leg room). The girl and I had a lot of wine and we were talking a lot about the movies we were watching. We ended up getting really snuggly under my jacket and our blankets. So anyway, I had a birthday on the flight, and made note of it when the clock hit midnight where we were flying. So she decided she was going to give me a little birthday present and she kissed me. Kissing quickly moved into other things (The guy on the aisle had fallen asleep by now, and he provided ample cover for our activities). We were able to basically shield ourselves from prying eyes with my jacket and it just looked like she had her head in my lap, napping.

18. We Promised Ourselves

Years ago myself and my g/f at the time took a red eye flight from the southwest to the northeast. Everyone on the plane was asleep. We were supposed to get up and make our move at the time, but then before we knew it, we both fell asleep too.

We woke up to the sun rising and half the plane now awake. But we promised ourselves we were to do it anyway! So she went to the lavatory and stayed in there for about 5minutes. Then I went back there, knocked on the door (yes in front of airline attendants and all). I opened, I said, “are you doing okay” and I just walked in.

We did our business, then when I left the bathroom I immediately went to alight attendant. Of course they gave me a look of WTF. However, I simply asked, can I please get a bottle of water, my g/f is epileptic and isn’t doing well in there.

They gave me a free bottle of water. Gave it to her. I went and sat back down. She finished up and came back out.

Did it all with the plane totally awake.

19. Least Satisfying Sex Ever

Not sure what type of plane it was but it was an overnight flight from Montreal to Frankfurt and the plane had 2 rows of bathrooms (there must have been 6 bathrooms per side) down a flight of stairs. It was a school trip and the gf and I went down initially to plug in my PSP since there were no working plugs near our seats. I was sitting on the can and she was sitting on my lap and we were literally just hanging out in there chatting and whatnot, no hanky panky. PSP charged up and we were about to leave when we figured ‘why not’ had a quickie, probably the least satisfying sex ever, cleaned up and walked out. One of the teachers was standing outside waiting to use the toilets and asked what we were doing. I showed him the PSP and charger cable and he bought it, mostly because the plug at his seat wasn’t working either.

That was almost 9 years ago, now that I’m a little older I would do things differently if the desire ever came up again, but the first time was so lackluster and underwhelming that I doubt I would make the effort a second time.

20. Why Bother With The Bathroom?

I feel like the bathroom is overdone and bait… Night flight from Toronto Pearson to Heathrow flying over the Atlantic, everyone on board was asleep and we all had blankets. We lucked out and got 3 seats to ourselves so naturally turned it into a bed like thing with arm rests up. Didn’t use the washroom but rather at the seat. It started off with a BJ and progressed. It wasn’t the most comfortable “session” but It happened. Best Europe trip to date.

21. Just Get Your Pilot’s License, Easy

Got my pilot’s license, bought a plane, asked a girl up.

22. Who Cares If People Know?

It depends on how you define “got away with” …

a) People never knew a thing

b) People knew but didn’t say anything, no ill consequence.

It was a smaller plane, I think an A300 Airbus … midwest flight. She was the fight attendant with a thick russian accent, blonde hair and a great figure. We basically snuck in there and did it for the short cruising portion of the flight. There was a row of business dorks behind my seat who had been hitting on her (but they all had wedding rings tsk tsk) but she was fond of me it seems. We walked out and they had smirks.

She overnighted in the city too. Never saw her again. Good times!

23. Tall But Flexible

It was my husband’s birthday and as we crossed the date line he got to enjoy it twice!

The champagne was flowing along with any inhibitions. They lights had been turned out for the passengers to go to sleep when I took his hand and led him into the toilet.

We are both tall people but luckily I am very flexible so was able to have one leg on the ground and the other wrapped around him as we joined the MHC.

We exited the toilets and no one stirred. We returned to our seats but as I said before he enjoyed it twice! About 10 minutes later both rested and refreshed we returned to the toilets for round 2. TC mark

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