Thought Catalog
February 6, 2017

It’s Ok Not To Love Yourself Every Day

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God & Man
God & Man

It’s ok not to love yourself every day. In fact, it’s just human. Always striving to be better, to do better and to look better. It’s just human, to want to be the best.

But it’s ok not to be the best. And it’s ok to mourn that.

Society tells us to be competitive. To be the girl who goes the farthest on the elliptical machine. To be the guy who lifts the heaviest weight. To be the one in your friend group with the most Instagram followers. To be the best employee who gets the highest raise and the most benefits.

But we all can’t be the best in everything. We all can’t win every single contest we throw ourselves into. We all can’t be the best of the best, 24/7. 

But maybe that’s ok. Maybe that’s more than ok.

Maybe it’s just a part of being human. A part of being a person. To look in the mirror and sigh at the imperfections we have disliked since we were twelve. Maybe it’s just how we are programmed. To look at the red grade on our paper we worked so hard on and crumple it up in disappointment. Maybe it’s how it has always been. To work so hard at a job we love and still not feel like we are good enough. To sigh in frustration when we see hard work not being paid off. To cry in desperation for all that we are not.

I don’t think we are supposed to love ourselves every day. I don’t think we are supposed to love ourselves every second of every hour. I don’t think it’s even possible.

We have hearts that break and bruise. We have egos that inflate and deflate in seconds. We are made up of bones that break. We aren’t made up of bulletproof vests. We don’t have enough hours in a day to be geniuses. We don’t all have time to workout until we have washboard abs. We don’t have enough days in a week to get to where we truly want to be. We don’t have enough time to be the perfect people that we strive to be.

We don’t have time to do it all.

And maybe that’s what keeps us humble. Maybe that’s how it’s supposed to be. To be ok with who we are without looking perfect. To be ok with who we are without the fame and the fortune. To learn how to be ok just as who we are now. No matter how long it takes.

And maybe it’s just part of having hearts that can break. Of having souls that can sway. To work and to fall. To love and to hurt. To live and to die. To strive for so much, but in the end, learn that it’s ok to not be the greatest. To work for the city lights, and in the end figuring out that where we are right now is enough.

To finally realize that we are enough, even if we fail. That we are enough, even if we don’t love everything about ourselves in this very moment. To realize that we are enough, without who we once loved. 

So, it’s ok to not love yourself every day. As long as you can look in the mirror and see how far you have come. As long as you can accept yourself for who you are, your flaws and imperfections and cellulite included. As long as you can look at yourself and smile at the progress. Smile at the person you have become, inside and out.

Because at the end of the day, you learn that the success really doesn’t matter after all. All the money and the fame in the world doesn’t matter now. What matters is how you view yourself, and how you rise up from the dark times and dark moments.

Loving yourself will never be linear. It will always go up and down and sometimes will skyrocket, or take a deep plunge. Please know that that’s ok. Know that you are always a work in progress.

You are not the same person as you were yesterday. Tomorrow, you will be someone different than who you are today. You are always going to be evolving, changing, learning and growing. So hold onto the good parts. Hold onto what makes you you.

And no matter how many times you fall, always be sure that you can still find the good in the failure. And always be sure to find the good in the bad that this life brings your wayTC mark