When you have a breakup with someone you envisioned walking down the aisle towards, it can incredibly shocking. It can almost feel like you’re in a terrible nightmare, just waiting to wake up. 

You think to yourself, I’m never going to get over them. They are the perfect person for me. This can’t be the end. You say to yourself, This person was the person I’m supposed to be with. They will come back to me…They have to.

But, those thoughts aren’t going to stay forever in your mind.

I promise you, you are going to move on from this person. It doesn’t matter how long you were together. It doesn’t matter how picture perfect you were together. You will eventually realize that maybe they weren’t so great after all. Or maybe you will eventually realize that everything happens for a reason, and you’ll find someone else when you’re ready.

You will move on from this person. And this is how you’ll do it.

You’re going to cry. There is no doubt about it, no matter if you are a guy or a girl. Everyone cries. That’s just how grief works. You’re going to probably be in denial for a long time, so you’ll keep everything they gave you. You’ll keep the pictures up on your Instagram and Facebook, just in case they will come to their senses.

You’re going to drunk text them. It’s just what happens. You’re going to drunkenly type on your phone things like, ‘I misss youuuu’ and ‘ I still love you. Let’s get back together’. The next morning you will wake up with shame more powerful than your headache. Because, you’ll look down on your phone and realize they didn’t respond. 

You’re going to wallow in self pity. You’re going to listen to really sad music and sleep till 3 pm most days. You won’t be able to eat because you hurt too much everywhere. You will think that you won’t ever smile again. Or be happy again. 

You’re going to get angry. You’re going to curse them for ending it. You’re going to curse them for not wanting you back. You’re going to punch a few walls, or at least attempt to. And you’re going to tear up their letters and pictures and erase every memory you have of them.

And my god, will you miss them.

Then one day, you’re going to wake up without the pit in your stomach. You’re going to still be sad sure, but you will feel a little bit better for some reason. You don’t know how, or why. But for some reason, you miss them a little bit less.

A friend will tell you a joke, and you’ll actually crack a small smile, remembering that there are still things to enjoy about life even though they are gone. And then you’re going to go for a night out and actually enjoy yourself. And you aren’t going to get the urge to contact them.

And one day, you will realize that you are over them. It won’t be easy. It won’t be quick. And it won’t be a simple process. But it will just happen.

And one day, you will meet a person who doesn’t make you feel empty anymore. You will meet a person who doesn’t remind you of them. And you’ll be ready. Ready to finally let go of that person that you used to want to marry. Ready to give up on that ‘forever’. And you’ll finally be happy.