Loving yourself doesn’t happen overnight. It doesn’t happen after three clicks of your shoes, or after a day of exercising. It takes work. And it takes time.

The journey of loving yourself isn’t always going to be linear. And it isn’t going to always be balanced. There will be days where you look in the mirror and hate what you see. There will be days where you pick apart every single flaw you see on yourself, and you will feel all your hard work going down the drain. But there will also be beautiful days, where you get up in the morning and like who you are. And you will smile to yourself, proud of how far you have come.

Loving myself didn’t come easily. And it still doesn’t. I have always been a people pleaser, and will go the extra mile just to make someone else happy. And this means that sometimes, I beat myself up too hard over mistakes. And this means that at times, I make a little less room for myself in my own life. And I put myself in second place.

I hope you put yourself in first place.

We all have to learn how to be ok with ourselves. We have to know that it’s ok to make mistakes and to be major fuck ups. We are humans after all.

You aren’t going to magically wake up one day, snap your fingers, and fall in love with yourself. You aren’t going to feel it instantly. You are going to have to try and really work at this. 

Stop neglecting your own needs and wants. Listen to your gut when you feel that something isn’t right. Treat yourself like you would a lover. Forgive yourself when you mess up. Forgive yourself when you cause someone harm or heartache. Forgive and accept your own decisions.

Be kind to yourself.

Show yourself that you are caring and that you are beautiful. And know that you don’t need anyone to tell you this, except for yourself. Embrace yourself. Embrace all of your flaws, stretch marks, and stomach rolls. Embrace your hideous laugh, your terrible ability to make jokes, and your habit of making bad decisions. Embrace it all. Embrace all of you.

Don’t give up on your goals and dreams. You know exactly what you are capable of. You know what you can accomplish. So prove it to yourself, and at the very least, try. And know at the end of the day that you at least gave it your best shot.

It’s not always going to be a pretty picture.

You are going to struggle, and some days will feel like the end of the world. But loving yourself isn’t always supposed to look perfect. It’s messy and imperfect. And as long as you acknowledge that it’s going to be flawed and scary at times, you are on your way to accepting who you truly are at your core. And one day, you will know that you are in fact worth your own love. And you’ll realize that you are the most incredible you, that you have ever met.