How To Be Pro Life (Without Being An Asshole And A Hypocrite)

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Don’t picket and pray the rosary in front of an abortion clinic.

If your goal was to make this woman feel even more afraid and ashamed than she already feels, congratulations, you win. Your job is not to judge. Not only is it not your job, it’s not your right or your privilege. It is also not your job to remind anyone that God will judge them with a disapproving stare. Your job is to love without stopping to ask whether or not the person in front of you deserves it. I talked with Jesus this morning and I feel strongly that if he were here, he would not be holding a picket sign. He would be with that woman when she reads the test. He would be consoling her through every tough conversation. He would be sitting next to her in every waiting room at every doctor’s appointment. He would never and will never leave her side.

Don’t post judgmental shit on Facebook.

And don’t text it to someone you know is considering an abortion either. Listen. I get it. Abortion breaks your heart. It breaks my heart. There are some really good infographics, memes and quotes out there. Mother Teresa has some real zingers. The things is, you’re not helping by blasting them on social media. You’re actually making things worse. You make pro life people look like angry morons who hate women. When you do this, you are part of the problem, not the solution. So keep those in your private stash to keep the fire in your soul roaring. And use that fire to consume everyone you meet with grace and mercy. Hug somebody. Tell them you love them and that you’re in their corner and make yourself available to talk or listen or be a shoulder to cry on. Be Jesus to them. Be so busy loving people that you don’t have time to post your crap on Facebook.

Be fierce.

Do not say quietly, timidly that you are pro life. Be proud and explain yourself clearly. Share your heart and articulate your reason for your position. “Because the Catholic Church says so” is a shitty reason. “Because that’s how my parents raised me” is garbage. You’re grown up. Do better. Be pro life because you miss the niece you’ll never meet. Be pro life because science. Be pro life because you fucking believe that every life matters from conception to natural death with all your heart and mind and soul. Be bold and unapologetic.

Actually Do Something.

It’s really nice to say you’re pro life. It’s sweet, really. You know what’s not nice?  Homelessness, hungry children, poverty, food desserts, seniors who are left in nursing homes like a dog left at the pound. So if you say you’re pro life, then be pro life. Pro every life. Clothe the naked. Feed the hungry. Give shelter to the homeless. Take in the orphan and the widow. Visit the imprisoned. If you claim to be pro life and turn away from these people right in front of you, then you are a hypocrite and every word out of your mouth is horse shit.

I’m tired of every childish conversation surrounding this issue. It seems that the conclusion is this:  If you’re pro life, you hate women and if you’re pro choice, you hate babies. Let’s stop making each other the bad guy and have a real conversation for like 5 minutes. Let’s stop speaking to be understood and listen to understand. It doesn’t mean we have to agree. We don’t. But nothing, absolutely nothing will be accomplished as long as we’re just screaming at each other. I am pro life. 1000% pro life. I would say that 75% of my friends are pro choice. Some of them have well thought out reasons and some of them don’t, but it’s not my job to argue with them or convince them I’m right. It’s my job to listen to them and share my own beliefs with love and conviction.

It’s that simple.

Speak the truth with love and conviction. If we are to be the generation that sees the end of abortion, not because it’s illegal but because it’s unthinkable; if we are to be that generation, it will not be due to our logic or rosary praying or our picket signs. It will be because we burn with a fire that is so bright it draws people to the truth. It will be because we are living examples of the truth lived out, not as a chore but as a gift. It will be because we are fierce in our fight for life, because we live our own lives with joy and gratitude and awe and wonder.