Thought Catalog
June 14, 2017

It’s Not About Ignoring Your Pain, But Feeling Every Single Part Of It

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What is the issue?
Sam Burriss

Too often when we go through a season of grief, people try to talk us out of it. It’s something we all do. Whenever sadness arises we try to push it away. We are taught that we should find distractions when we’re sad. For some reason, in our world, being sad is bad and being happy is good. Society expects you to act happy, even if you’re not.

But what if I told you that the only way to true happiness is accepting sadness.
Not only accepting, but truly feeling sadness at time
s.

Because of my depression, sadness has been one of my closest friends. It is one I’ve tried to run away from my entire life. Before, whenever I felt sad, I tried to numb the feeling. This is the reason why I struggled with self harm and suicide attempts so often. I could not handle the constant sadness that slowly became my life. I thought I was supposed to be happy but I couldn’t be. There was no way out.

But that wounded girl has found her coat of arms. After years of struggling with depression, self-harm and suicide, along with a hospitalization, I am now getting back up again.

One of the things that helped me was no longer running from feeling sad, but embracing those feelings. Seeing them as a part of recovery.

If this is you, I urge you to feel your sadness too.

Cry.

Pamper yourself through these seasons.

Go see some friends and share your grief!

Cry some more.

It’s so important to find something to hold onto. Find your hope, your sunshine when skies are grey.

I still cry regularly about the things that happened in my youth. But it’s no longer a cry of hopelessness. It’s a cry of relief.

Relief that it’s over now.

I’m going to be real here: there will be days in which the only thing you can do is breathe. Other days you’ll feel like you’re relapsing. Sometimes, though, it may even seem easy. It doesn’t matter how long you’re at the bottom as long as you eventually arise again.

Because the only way out is through. TC mark

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