I Miss You When I Shouldn’t

You’re going to miss the person you shouldn’t.

One night, after you’ve emptied the bottle

and heard everyone tell you you’re better off,

you’re going to lie in your bed

and you’ll long for the one you have no business longing for

and your bed sheets will literally ache with their absence

A coldness no amount of blankets can cover

will chill your soul and crush your spirits

until you feel like you can’t actually breathe without them next to you

You’ll feel every ounce of loneliness trace along your skin

the way their hands once did.

And yes, for a moment, the hurt they brought

will flash through your mind

but just as it comes, the memory of their hand

laying effortlessly upon your hip

will make you disregard the pain and crave the pleasure.

And really, there’s no complex, poetic

way that makes any kind of sense

to simply explain why, and how, you simply miss them

Because there comes a point where the sweet nothings

are replaced with whispers of remorse

as you play back every scene

wondering how you could have made them stay

So in the end, it doesn’t matter if they hurt you

because one day you will miss them

And their sheer silence

will hurt more than their words ever did.