Katie Mather

I’m just one of the guys, but in the body of a really hot girl.

We’d wander around the aisles at 10pm and almost always forget to buy the things he said he needed to get in the first place.

You’ve officially been assigned into the Cute Girl Category. We know you applied for the Sexy Category, but after a panel of qualified straight men examined your portfolio and read your personal statement, we decided that you definitely have more potential to be Cute rather than Sexy.

There is something really terrifying to me about the moments right before you fall asleep and I wonder if Regular People feel that way too.

Congratulations!

We Made Eye Contact On The Subway And I Immediately Imagined Our Future Together (We Move To The Suburbs And Have Three Beautiful Kids)

Dan: “Oh, you write? That must be nice. Have you ever heard of Deutsche Bank though?”
Liz: “You write? Fantastic. What’s your last name? I’m going to read everything you’ve ever published right now in line for the bathroom.”

I like to be the big spoon sometimes because I secretly think about how vulnerable the other person is.