17 Things To Do If You’re Snowed In
1. Watch all of ‘House of Cards’ and ‘Freaks and Geeks’ on Netflix Instant. You will be a better person, with more to talk about at parties.
2. Have sex or masturbate. Do it a bunch of times. Maybe try and go for your personal record of jizzes.
3. Do yoga in your living room. Go through the moves for a hour and try to set your own vinyasa.
4. Read that book you’ve had on your nightstand for like, two years. It will no longer taunt you.
5. Watch a documentary about fracking. It’s insane. Everyone should know more about fracking.
6. Call your mom and tell her you love and appreciate her.
7. Clean your room, organize your shelves and drawers by color and item so you never again scramble to find that black skirt like you always do.
8. Paint your nails fun colors, and attempt some wacky nail art.
9. Make a list of your goals for the next few months. Really take the time to think them out and write them down so now you’re accountable to yourself.
10. Clean out your phone contacts. Get rid of toxic friends or ex-hook ups who make you feel terrible.
11. Organize your iTunes. Make playlists that remind you of college or of your hometown. Make a playlist for the person you have a crush on right now. Make a playlist for being snowed in.
12. See if you can listen to every Beatles song in a row. Do not skip Octopus’ Garden. DO NOT SKIP OCTOPUS’ GARDEN.
13. Write someone you haven’t talked to in a while a hand-written letter, with intent to mail it later. Make it really sweet and personal.
14. Try out some different hair styles and mix and match your clothes to maybe find new outfits you never would have tried.
15. Do a skin masque. I recommend Helene’s mint julep. It’s green and makes your skin feel amazing. Keep that sucker on as long as you’re snowed in. Who cares? No one will see you.
16. Draw. Get some paper and see if maybe you’re a secret talented artist. Maybe you’re the next Basquiat.
17. Meditate. Listen to the sounds of the snow outside and breathe deeply. Clear your mind. Nothing’s gonna happen while it’s snowing this hard. Take the time to relax.
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The bravest thing we could do is confront reality as it is.
Somewhere along the line it spread through the stay-at-home-mom circle that Target is the best place to bring your screaming child on a Friday morning, because they are everywhere.
2. After a minute or so of awkward conversation, everyone leaves
He thought he lost face, but instead, something awesome happened.