September 19, 2016

Why We Need To Stop Blaming ‘Modern Dating’ And Just Chill The Hell Out

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What is the issue?
BP.Photography
BP.Photography

There are probably hundreds of articles on the internet that will tell you “Modern Dating Is Totally Screwed” or “Social Media Has Ruined Dating.” What do I say to those people?

Take a freakin chill pill.

I understand the concepts of having high standards. I think girls, especially girls in their early twenties who are actively dating, should have high standards for themselves. High standards show self-respect and self-love, and they important for managing our personal lives. HOWEVER, when something doesn’t meet your highest expectations, it is not always society’s fault. People are so quick to judge this generation for impersonal texting conversations or a missed call because a phone died. (Is in a ditch somewhere? He must be in a ditch if he isn’t answering his phone.)

But we are failing to remember that times change! All the freakin time! Isn’t it about time we grow up and accept it?

Now, this isn’t an excuse for anyone to start acting like a jerk. So you still can’t stand people up on a date or refuse to pick someone up for a date you arranged — sorry not sorry.

My point is that dating is in no way screwed.

(I would drop the f bomb here if my mom wasn’t going to be reading this.)

If you say modern dating is screwed, I’m assuming you’ve already given up. Which sucks for you, because dating is great! Dating is fun and adventurous and scary all at the same time! Sure, a boy may text you to ask you on a date but SO?! If nothing else, honey take the meal and the good conversation and go for it. Who cares how they asked you out? Wouldn’t you find it a little creepy if a random letter appeared in your mailbox saying they would like to take you out sometime? I would much rather receive a text than that stalker-ish play (He knows where you live but doesn’t even know your last name yet? Yikes.) But that’s what people are essentially asking for.

People always ask, why can’t dating be like the old days? Well let me tell you about the old days. Whenever I complain to my parents that my boyfriend lives four hours away, they remind me that when they did long distance they spoke MAYBE a few times on the phone and they had to pay extra for the long distance. That sounds God awful miserable. Who wants that?! (Love you Mom and Dad.)

Stop complaining that modern dating isn’t spontaneous enough. Uhh hello, he’s at work. He cannot just leave and bring you flowers in the middle of the day. And I’m assuming neither can you. That’s just the demands of life. He’s not being a douche, he’s at work, or walking the dog, or taking care of his elderly grandma. Again, think of our parents. They did it, and most of them turned out fine, right?

Stop complaining that he asked you out over text. It’s not the end of the world. Chances are, he’s not a jerk, he’s just too nervous to call you because his voice will probably crack or something (LOL puberty.) At least you’re going out! That is the end goal, is it not? If it’s not, I’ve been doing this whole “dating” thing REALLY wrong.

So enjoy the date. Enjoy dating! Be the most confident and gorgeous you and don’t worry about society’s newest “version” of dating. Stop freaking out because he didn’t call you the day after. If it’s meant to be, I’m SURE he’ll text you. Or show up at your door. But I’m really hoping he just texts you. TC mark

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