You’ve been dating someone for a while, but it’s coming to an end and you need a place to have that conversation. It’s not easy to find a quiet, private and convenient place to talk in this city. Here is a list of 6 deserted break up spots that are easy to get to and insignificant enough that you can ruin them with a heartbreaking moment without ever having to return.
1. The Financial District (on a Weekend)
If you’re lucky enough to be breaking up on a weekend, there’s no better place than New York’s Financial District. On Saturdays and Sundays, the corporate devils who broke our country’s economy are away enjoying their hard-earned cash, thus turning this historic neighborhood into a resort of deserted parks and alleyways – perfect for your painful conversation.
2. The Basement of Disco Ray’s Dive Bar in Chinatown
The basement level of Disco Ray’s Dive Bar is never crowded, and anybody who may be around is drunk and Chinese anyway. The bar’s broken speaker system means loud music won’t block you from hearing each other’s painful remarks about what you did wrong. The owners, Randall and Su, have hosted over 800+ breakups since they opened in 1982.
3. Wilson L Subway Stop
If you live in Brooklyn but don’t want to ruin your favorite Williamsburg wine spot, then try the Wilson L. More central parts of Bushwick are filled with eavesdropping artists waiting to steal your pain for their creative energy, but the Wilson L should be just abandoned enough to avoid them. The corner with the shattered warehouse is great for hearing how much of a failure you are.
4. Roosevelt Island
I said all these places would be convenient, and trust me, Roosevelt Island is not hard to get to! The F train stops right in the middle and the aerial cable car runs every fifteen minutes from the Upper East Side! Roosevelt Island has some great parks, an adorable Main Street and there’s even a Duane Reade. It really is a great place to live! Did I say live? I mean, break up.
5. East River Park
The ample seating, glittering river and lit-up Williamsburg Bridge at East River Park make this spot just so darn pretty. The shimmering skyline will reflect your tears in a way that may make you fall in love all over again. So, actually, steer clear of this place for your break up. Unless that’s what you’re hoping for, I guess.
6. Crack is Wack Playground on 127th St and 2nd
I haven’t actually been here, but I assume it’s a fine place for a breakup. It’s certainly not a tourist spot and there’s no reason you’ll ever come back. I think there’s a mural.
Good luck with your impending break up. Just remember never to do it in your apartment, in Queens or on a boat.