All along its love I have been looking for. The kind of love I deserve. The love who would grow on and in me. Whose smile would mean every little damn reason this world holds to live. The one who would hug me tight out of the blue, just because.
The one who would understand why. Why I have these flaws. Why I have to do the things I do. Why, despite my incapability, I still try because I have to. I’ve been looking for the love that would be true.
A love worth fighting for. A love that transcends beyond just feeling. I have been looking for the love who would hold me. All of me. The best, and most especially, the worst of me. The love that would not fear me. One who would be there to be with me, where she doesn’t have to say a single word. Just…be there.
I long for love that would want me. Would go out of their way to spend a minute. A love that understands she does not have to reciprocate. Just do the way she knows how. A love that doesn’t have to prove something. Anything. A love who understands that she doesn’t need me to complete her, and in the same way, she doesn’t complete me.
Love should be a gift. A reward for all the hardships. For all the pain and the broken heart. Love is the rainbow after the rain of tears. The bright sky after the storm of mixed emotions.
I have been looking for a love that is not perfect. Just the love that would learn to stay.
And in my journey, I have found love. In fragments. Found them in different people. And every time I encountered a piece of love, I would think I have found the whole of it. But every damn time, it’s the same thing. Splinters of a broken heart left discarded in the corner of an empty lot as I stumble on the road, eyes cloudy with the rain that seems to fall only on them.
But the journey continues. And there is fear that says I might not find love whole at all.
Still, I keep walking. Hoping. And as I pick up piece after piece of love I stumble upon, I do wish someday I find another who has been doing the same.
The fragments I gathered and the pieces she has will form the love we’ve been searching for.
And it would be infinite.