Thought Catalog
May 10, 2017

10 Signs You’re Fooling Yourself Into Thinking He Gives A Shit

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What is the issue?
Drew Wilson

1. You overanalyze everything he says and does, giving meaning to things that have none. He’s never told you that he loves you, but you assume that he must, because of the way he looks at you. He’s never called you his girlfriend, but you assume that you are, because he’s never mentioned another girl.

2. You twist the story whenever you talk about him. Your friends keep telling you that it’s so obvious he cares about you — but that’s only because you pick and choose which pieces of the story to tell them. You mention all of the fun times you’ve had together, but you leave out the parts where he went two weeks without texting you.

3. You only pay attention to the good stuff. He texts you most mornings. He tells you that you’re beautiful. He’s even admitted that he has feelings for you. You focus on all of the things that he’s been doing right and ignore all of the things he’s been doing wrong, because it’s easier that way.

4. You justify his bad behavior. Whenever he waits a full day to answer your messages, you tell yourself that he must be busy, that his phone must have died, that he must have a reason why he’s not present — because it can’t be because he’s choosing to put you second.

5. You pay more attention to his words than his actions. You believe him when he says that you’re the only girl in his life, that he wants you and only you, that he would never leave you for someone else — even though he’s been hanging out with other girls and coming home late and showing all the signs of a cheater. You’re blindly believing what he says even though he doesn’t back it up with his actions.

6. You’re complimented by red flags. He gets pissed at you for hanging out with a guy friend and you’re happy he’s jealous. He begs for nudes before the first date and you’re flattered he finds you attractive. You’re delighted by the things you should be insulted by.

7. You only think about the past. There was a time when he opened doors for you and offered you his jacket and acted like you mattered the most. You keep thinking about how well he treated you in the past and avoid thinking about how horribly he’s been treating you lately, because you’ve forgotten that feelings can change.

8. You’re assuming that he thinks like you. You’re assuming that the kiss meant something. That he wouldn’t hang out with you for weeks, unless he wanted to date you. That his mind works the same way as yours does.

9. You picture him differently in your mind. The person that you imagine in your head isn’t the same person that’s standing in front of you. In your mind, he’s kind and sweet and sensitive. But in reality, he isn’t any of those things.

10. You really want to be with him. You like him so much that you’ve twisted everything he says and does into a positive. You think that he likes you, because you want him to like you. You’re seeing what you want to see and ignoring the reality. TC mark

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