Thought Catalog
April 18, 2017

10 Things That Happen When You Find Your Forever Person (After A Lifetime Of Not Believing In Love)

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God & Man

1. You don’t know who you are anymore.

You were always the person that made fun of flowers and chocolates and public displays of affection. The old you would never do something embarrassing, like take kissing selfies. But now you baby talk and share dessert and do all of the things that you swore you would never do.

2. You worry way more than you should.

Even when your relationship is going well, you feel insecure. You trust your partner — but it’s hard, because you’ve gone through the rest of your life not trusting anyone. It’s hard to adjust from thinking that everyone in life will leave you to thinking that this person will be around forever. 

3. You try not to talk about them too much.

You’re used to being independent, so even though you want to brag to the world about the birthday gifts they bought you and the vacation you took overseas together, you try to tone it down. You don’t want it to seem like your entire life revolves around your person. You don’t want to look like love is suddenly the only thing you care about — because you know there’s more to life.

4. You feel like a total hypocrite.

You’re always saying how relationships never last. How every couple is bound to break up eventually. How fate and destiny and true love are all lies. But now, you hesitate before you say those things, because you’re not sure if you still believe them. After all, you are in love. Your skepticism is slowly fading away.

5. You question your entire future.

You used to be able to picture your future perfectly — but now, everything has changed. You never even considered marriage, because you assumed you’d always be on your own. But now, you aren’t so sure. You kind of want to walk down the aisle with them. You kind of want to share a bed and a house and a life.

6. You understand all of those things you used to hate.

All of those cliche Nicholas Sparks novels? All of those dramatic Taylor Swift songs? You used to hate them with a passion, but now you understand where they were coming from. You get why people are so obsessed with the idea of falling in love.

7. You force yourself to take things slow.

Even though you’re deeply in love, you don’t want to make the biggest mistake of your life. You still have some skepticism hidden inside of you, so you want to know the person for a while before committing your life to them. You want to progress at a pace you’re comfortable with, which means waiting to move into their apartment and get married and have children.

8. You struggle to show them how much you care.

You’re not used to grand, romantic gestures. You’re not even used to uttering the L word. You want to show this person how much you care about them, but you’re not sure what you can do to express how strong your feelings are.

9. But everyone else realizes how serious the relationship is.

Your friends know that you aren’t the mushy type. You’re not the kind of person to say I love you on the first date or talk about owning a dog with someone. So once they hear that you’ve been talking about the future with your partner, they know you’re dead serious. They know that this person must be the one.

10. You become absolutely terrified.

What if you’re wrong about forever and they do end up leaving? What if they cheat? What if they get bored? Or what if you mess everything up, because you’re not used to healthy, happy relationships and aren’t sure how to handle them? You’re more terrified than you’ve ever been, because you really like this person. You really hope that they remain a permanent part of your life. TC mark