October 13, 2016

The Shittiest Part Of Your 20s Is Feeling Trapped

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Jeff Isy
Jeff Isy

You’re not a baby. You’re not a toddler. You’re not a teen. But you’re not an adult, either. Everyone keeps saying that you are, but it feels like a lie. Sure, you know how to drive and how to do your own laundry and how to warm up your dinner, but you still rely on your parents for more than you want to. You still rely on them to give you a place to live.

Even if you’re already out of your childhood home, living in an apartment of your own, it’s not like you have the money for anything fancy. You’re not lazy. In fact, you’re a workaholic. But rent is expensive, so it’s impossible to find a place that you’re proud of.

Instead of going out and getting the apartment that you want, of living the life that you want, you stay in one place. You’re stuck in one place. And you have no idea when you’re ever going to make it out of there.

And it’s all because of money.

You don’t have the money to take the vacation that would eliminate your pent-up stress. You don’t have the money to afford a high-end apartment in the city. You don’t have the money to take a break from your part-time job to go after the job that you really want.

Meanwhile, there are kids you knew from high school that are somehow traveling the world, uploading pictures from Rome and London. And then there are the baby boomers claiming that your generation is lazy and that you’re a disappointment for living with your parents when they moved out at 16.

But it’s not your fault. You’re not trying to latch onto your childhood. You’re not afraid of leaving your parents behind. You’re not afraid to work for what you want. You’re trying. You’re trying so hard.

You don’t want to feel trapped. Claustrophobic. Suffocated. Like you can’t escape, no matter what you do. You don’t want to feel like you don’t have a future when, deep down, you know that it’s far from the truth. But right now, everything feels hopeless. You feel like you’re never going to get where you want to be.

But you will. And when you do, when you’re finally on your way to reaching your own version of success, do whatever you can to avoid feeling trapped again in the future.

Don’t let your significant other take care of you financially, because if you can’t support yourself, you won’t be able to leave when you want a divorce. Don’t go from relying on your parents to relying on a partner, even when it comes to things as simple as changing the oil in your car, because if you need them, you won’t be able to escape when the time comes.

Right now, you can’t help yourself from feeling trapped. But you can avoid feeling trapped again in the future. You can kick ass at your job. You can learn how to cook and sew and change a tire, so you’re truly self-efficient. You can save up for the life that you’ve always wanted.

Because, even though it might not happen until your 30s, you will live that life. And the wait will be worth it. TC mark

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