Thought Catalog
April 19, 2017

There Was Never An ‘Us,’ But I Still Miss You

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You’ve always been my “special someone”. Someone that made my day complete just by simply seeing your face. You’ve done nothing but your smiles never failed to make my heart skip a beat.

Your laughs, as cliché and hyperbolic as it seems, are music to my ears that even beats Elgar’s Salut d’Amour. You’re like the sun in my own system of stars and asteroids. You were almost my everything.

But there was never an “us.” You were never mine. There’s you and there’s me, but never ‘you and me.’ You have your own world which never needed me to move. You have your own path that would never cross mine.

I would have been very willing to do something. Anything. Just to make you look my way.

It’s not like I want to own you. I just want a few seconds of glance coming from you intended for me. Just for me. Or maybe a minute of your music dedicated for my ears to hear. But then, there was never an “us.”

There was never an “us”. But I miss you. I miss the look in your eyes even though they were not focused to me. I miss the way you laugh even though I’m not the reason behind them. I miss the times when you would pass by even if you never notice me. I miss seeing you show your practiced moves in front of an excited crowd that you never knew I was a part of. I miss seeing you treat other girls with so much gentleness that you would never offer me. I miss you even if you don’t miss me.

I miss you, and it always disappoints me how the possibility of seeing you again would never cure this negative feeling inside me. It’s like being sad about something you lost.

But and I can never blame you for making me feel this way. It is not your fault for not knowing me. It’s not your fault for not noticing me.

I’m just a classmate. A fan. An admirer. But I miss you.

And I’d still miss you even if there was never a “me and you.” TC mark

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