Thought Catalog
May 19, 2011

What Is It With Fingering? An Essay?

Report This Article
What is the issue?

Do guys really like fingering a girl and do girls really like to get fingered?  These are the important questions I sometimes ask myself.  I have been mulling over fingering for the last two days in an attempt to get to the bottom of it.  I will pen my thoughts as they arise.  Call it ‘thinking out loud’ if you will.

When I was a young girl and my pubic hair was just starting to reach its full potential, I remember one of my brother’s friends tried to finger me under a beach towel.  He was forcing his hand between my legs, trying to gain leverage under my swimsuit bottoms.  I didn’t know what he was trying to do but I did know that a young man’s hands on my private parts in broad daylight was not something God would smile upon. Good thing I had tremendous thighs or I would’ve lost my fingerginity much too early in life.  Later I overheard him telling another guy that he ‘totally tried to finger me’ and then I understood:  he wanted to put his fingers in my vagina. (GROSS!)

Why do guys like fingering?  Perhaps it’s because in the initial endeavors of ‘hooking up with’ a girl, this might be all he gets. It’s like the apex is always the vagina, and reaching the apex is dick inside the vagina.  So, if you can only get your fingers in there, you have not exactly lost maybe…maybe you still get ‘points’ or something.

We all know fingers don’t have the same amount of nerve endings as a penis does. (But boy if it did, guys would be eating spaghetti in an entirely new way!)  So, we know fingering a girl will not feel quite as nice as it does when it is a penis.  So, perhaps the stimulation a guy gets from fingering a girl is in feeling the hot, wet, tightness (hopefully) around his fingers and maybe seeing her get pleasure (hopefully) from it.

I think, also, that maybe fingering is a testing ground.  You can maybe determine a few deciding factors such as;

  1. Does she get wet?
  2. Tightness
  3. Taste and smell
  4. Whorefactor

To expatiate:

Does she get wet?

If you are making out in a hot and heavy fashion and you push your hand under her belt buckle and snake it down into her panties army man style and find out that her liquidity levels do not match the steel trap boner you are sporting then maybe this is a miss-match.

Tightness

If you find that you can fit your entire hand and maybe a small koala into her vagina, maybe she’s not a tree you want to climb.

Taste and smell

I liken this to the checking of the oil when you are at a full service gas station.  I envision a man clad in greasy coveralls, a three day growth of beard and black under his fingernails withdrawing a dipstick and squinting at it over the cracks in my dashboard.  I figure a guy can get his digits down there, swirl it around for a few and maybe fake a nose itch or something and have his hand make his way back up to his face where it can afford him a ‘prelude of things to come’.  I will leave it at that.  (I will keep it ‘delicate’ and ‘tasteful’.)

Whorefactor

If a girl lets you finger her within hours of knowing her she could easily be a whore.  (Not in the literal sense…) This might be a winning factor for a man, or not.  In this day and age, guys are probably fingering girls on the dance floor.

Bottom line; I think guys like fingering girls because they are putting their fingers in her vagina and ‘fucking’ the vagina with the fingers.  It’s probably a great thing to do.

_____

Now for the ladies…

I think the ladies like fingering because it’s a chance to feel like you are being fucked without really being fucked. If you go back to point four, above, ‘Whorefactor,’ for a second, maybe I was wrong.  Maybe a girl will take a fingering before an actual fucking to prove she is NOT a whore.  Maybe fingering feels ‘safe’ for a girl.  Maybe the allowance of a fingering is a girl telling a guy, “I like you enough to put your fingers inside of me, but I’m not quite ready for your penis.”  It might be a girl’s way of ‘not letting a guy down’ while still keeping him ‘up’.  (funny.)

A girl letting a guy finger her could be like a promise ring.

In the case of stimulation, this is where the tables are turned on the men, because, as we all know, vaginas have way more nerve endings than fingers.  So when a man is fingering a girl, she gets an ample amount of stimulation.  Ha HA!  So, it’s pretty obvious that there is no case for argument here.  A girl likes to be fingered because it feels good in her vagina. (And she can’t get pregnant)

In summation…what have we learned?  I’m not sure that we’ve learned much of anything.  I think this is the first piece of writing where I’ve used the term ‘fingering’ so much.  I’ve just gone back and counted and I’m at 19. Wow…Impressive.  But I am digressing.

We’ve obviously learned that reading an in-depth thought provoking essay on fingering (20!) could lead to ‘boner time’ and also that I spent a few days actually thinking about the act of fingering (21!) so much so that I felt compelled to put pen to paper about it and what does that say about me? TC mark

image – Helga Weber