1. When You Watch
When I was probably about 12, we got Turbo Twists from some friends’ parents or something, the details escape me. Somebody thought they would be “educational” instead of “below my sister and I’s education level.” We had a red one and a green one, and to the best I can remember it was the red one that went bad, but that detail escapes me also (it was dark at the time, so I wasn’t even sure which one it was until morning).
Every time you turn one of these on by turning either end, the following sound is emitted by the speaker on the left end: “Do do do DO! Hey, DUDE, is that you? Hit it and let’s go!” You practically need the user’s manual to figure out it means that the button on the right end is essentially the “swipe to unlock”, and that’s what it’s telling you to do. One of the “features” is that you can customize what name it calls you by, but only out of a limited set of options they voice acted, most of which sucked. We left it on “DUDE”. Turn it off and it plays a short slap bass riff, “dadadau, daDAU.”
One night I was almost asleep in my bed when I hear the chime. “Do do do DO!” But immediately, “badadau, daDAU.” It just turned on and shut off, all by itself, halfway across the room. And then it did it again. And again. And I don’t mean it got the same amount into the opening, or that it even paused between shutting off and turning back on consistently. For the first few minutes it was nonstop. “Hey DUDE dadadau daDAU do do do dadadau daDAU do do do DO! Hey, DUDE, is that dadadau, DADAU.” Then it started taking longer breaks in between.
I was pretty freaked out by this point, watching it as intently as I could with my agonizing lack of night vision. I rolled over onto my other side, trying to ignore it. This is where things get bad. All of a sudden it just plain stops. I don’t make the connection until I turn to look again, and it starts turning on and off again. I turn back and forth a few times to make sure, spending a lot of time on each side. And every time it fucking confirms my suspicions. It only plays when I’m watching it.
I spent the rest of the night tucked under the covers, huddled up, and facing away from the demon-possessed piece of evil, not sure if it’s silently creeping up on me somehow and too scared to look, only to hear it louder and closer to my bed like the fucking mannequins in NM2 but noisy.
In the morning I was afraid to throw it out and afraid to keep it. I wanted to believe it hadn’t really happened, so I convinced myself it hadn’t, until the next night, when it happened again. Quiet all day no matter how I try to replicate the freakiness, then come midnight it glitches again. After that I was like NOPE and took the batteries out, which seemed to work. It happened again one more time months later, took it apart in the morning and there were batteries in it.