1. Still Secretly Lives In The House He Sold
Two and a half years ago I was in dire financial straights, so I sold my home to keep my struggling business afloat. I neglected to tell the owners that they have an 800 sq. ft. bunker on the property that I built about seven years ago. The bunker that I’ve called home since I sold it. The entrance to it is well-hidden, but I still come and go very early/very late in the day.
I’m a single man who keeps to himself. I’m now in a situation where I could move somewhere else, but I love this hidden paradise so much.
2. Mother Raised Him As A Girl
[Background, I’m a guy in my late 20s who was taken into care aged 7.] Everyone around me already knows that I was brought up by foster families because I had a shit early childhood. I deliberately keep it vague and say stuff like “I’d rather not go into it” so that people will just assume I was abused in some way and they’ll stop asking about it.
The truth is that for the first 7 years of my life, I was brought up as a girl by my psycho birth mother who really really really wanted a daughter and didn’t let the snag of giving birth to a boy stop her from trying to raise one.
She was a pretty successful professional in a legal field (not entirely sure what) and had me via anonymous sperm donor from a fertility clinic. She found out i was a boy at a late ultrasound and then moved across the country. Gave birth to me at home and continued to move about until I was 5 or so. It was just the two of us all my life, we had contact with other people, of course, but they rarely got very close. I had lots of friends, but was always supervised.
I found out way way after that my mother’s strong puritanical christianity was a lie she used to explain why she was so strict about me being ‘private’ and never letting anyone see me get changed or anything. i just accepted all of this as fact, having never been told anything different.
I was sent to a religious school for girls and had a really great childhood. i was a bit of a tomboy, and played with lego and toy animals, rather than dolls and stuff, but that’s not unusual and no one ever questioned i was a girl – even me. I knew about men and women, but had never really seen much of naked people. my mother never ever spoke to me about it, but i kinda had the impression that when i grew up and got boobs and stuff, my dick would kinda fall off or something and i would be a woman, and other kids would keep their dicks and they’d be men. I dunno, to be honest, i never really thought about it
Anyway, I carried on with my happy girlhood, and had a bunch of friends and everything was great until I was 7 and a teacher accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee over me at school. The liquid soaked through my clothes and was scalding me so the staff immediately stripped me out of my dress and underwear to get the hot coffee away from my skin. And then they found out.
The cops were called and I got taken to speak with who I guess would be Social Services. they asked me a bunch of questions about life at home and stuff. meanwhile, my mother was taken in for questioning too. she refused to acknowledge me as male and insisted i was her daughter. because she was, y’know, delusional and stuff, I wasn’t allowed to go back home but got put with a foster family and went through loads of therapy and stuff.
The worst part was that literally overnight, I lost EVERYTHING. my mother, my home, all my toys, all my clothes, I moved school so lost all my friends, they cut all my hair off and told me I wasn’t a girl any more. it was really really traumatic.
The first foster home wasn’t that great. They had three boys already and going from a sheltered ‘religious’ only-child upbringing to a rough-and-tumble testosterone-filled environment was really difficult. they tried to force me to e masculine and I was just too confused about what they wanted. anything ‘girly’ was reprimanded and I felt so lost and alone because nothing I did was right.
I tried to commit suicide when I was 11 and again at 13 because I didn’t feel I fit in anywhere. After the second attempt, they moved me to a different foster family who were awesome. I consider them to be my parents. They actually stood up for me, the first thing was that they let me grow my hair. From when I got taken into care, they buzzed my hair short, and I hated it. they always had to hold me down and do it forcibly while I was crying and fighting. My new parents flatly refused to do it and said that loads of boys had long hair. They also let me quit karate and football and take up swimming and jazz dance. Since I’d been in care, no one had ever stood up for my right to choose what activities to do, or how to dress before. It was amazing.
In the end, I came out of it with a pretty healthy gender identity (I’m a guy, but not the most butch guy ever, but I’m fine with that), I went through school and got my degree and have a pretty good job and an amazing, supportive wife. Everything looks great.
But i can never speak about my early childhood, and how i grew up as a little girl.
3. Faked Their Own Death
I cut off all contact with everyone I know and moved to Kenya, I tell people a fake name and a fake background and have made it appear to my family that I died on boat trip in the Pacific. No I am not joking. I am dead in the United States.
4. Run’s A Wedding Cake Business Using Store Bought Mix
I run a cake business. I charge people hundreds for wedding cakes… Every last one is made using Pillsbury cake mix I buy for $1 a box at Walmart. I suck at baking. Every time I’ve ever tried to make a cake from scratch it sucked. But baking is like…my whole deal.
My friends all call me the cake girl. It’s like my whole life is a lie. People compliment my cakes all the time. Telling me how delicious they are. Telling me it’s so much better than box mix cake. Telling me they could never bake a cake so delicious. Well guess what? For $1, they too can make a cake just as delicious. Just add oil, eggs and water. In my defense, I love cake decorating. I make all of the frostings and fondant from scratch. I just hate baking fucking cakes!! I base my prices mostly on the decoration of the cakes and not of the cake itself of that makes sense. Still… No one knows about this except my husband. Even my best friends think I fucking slave over the oven mixing and baking these damn cakes. I have been doing this for YEARS. If anyone knew my business and reputation would be in the toilet for sure. I keep telling myself I have to learn how to make the damn cakes without the box mixes, but I never do it. I feel like such a sham sometimes.
5. Gay, Child Hooker
Ok, so this is a secret I’ve kept for nearly 20 years.
During the summers when I was growing up, my parents would often leave my brother and I (I’m male) with our aunt and uncle who lived out in the country. It was great as they had 4 sons of ages close to ours so we had a lot of fun doing kids stuff.
One summer when I was 8, the oldest cousin was maybe 16. We somehow got talking and he asked me if I wanted to sleep in his room that night. He has the nicest room and bed so I was all for it. Got into bed and he asked if he could touch my penis. I was 8 and just thought it was ok so I let him. He rubs it for a bit and then asks me to do the same to him. So I do. This progresses and eventually I’m sucking his cock. I think I knew this was wrong so I said I didn’t want to carry on. We stop and I goto sleep quite confused.
I wake up and he hands me some money and tells me never to tell anyone about what happened. Next night he tries to do the same thing.. But now all I care about is the money. So I do it. This carried on for 2 summers.
Eventually I got old enough to realize it was quite wrong regardless of the money and stopped.
I’ve not told anyone this. He’s now married with 2 kids. I’m also married and we see them sometimes at family events. I don’t have the balls to even try and talk to him about it.. Hell I’m not even sure what I’d say.
Tl;dr I was a gay child hooker.
6. Tricking Her Into Marriage
I once helped out my a female friend’s family by taking care of their cat for a week. Every day for a week, I would go over there and snoop around their house. I found my friend’s diary, and proceeded to read the entire thing. I used this information to get her to like me, and she is currently my wife.
7. Sick Girlfriend, Dead Relationships
I don’t want to be with my girlfriend anymore, but she might have cancer and I feel like I need to stay in the relationship.
8. Faked A College Degree
I faked the last two years of college education. My parents put so much pressure on me I couldn’t handle it (I was suffering from severe depression and anxiety) so I faked it all. Lied to everyone. Made up fake transcripts. I just got my foot in the door in my desired field thanks to a friend as they hired me as a subordinate. This place only hires college grads but no one double checked my credentials since I was recommended. My hopes is that if I need to find another job I’ll have been at this place long enough to get it by experience alone (I work for a very prestigious company). I’m not bad at my job. I’m actually quite good. But my fear is eventually I’ll hit a wall and the lie will come to light. No one has known this for the better part of a decade.
It’s a relief to finally say it “out loud.” I can’t even tell those I love. My silence is my prison.
9. Last Words
When I was 17 I had a argument with my father and told him to fuck off, later that evening he hung himself. Our argument was the last time he spoke to anyone in our family and for that I feel a terrible amount of guilt for. Instead of him saying good bye and I love you to my mom and brothers he got told to fuck off before he went and killed himself. My punishment is to live the rest of my days in shame and guilt. He never left a note either.
10. The Illusion Of Success
Everyone thinks I have a good job and roommates but I’ve been homeless and a prostitute for over year.
11. The Keeper Of Everyone Else’s Secrets
IT guy here, it’s amazing what people will do on their computers and say in their emails despite having to sign a waiver that all computer activity at work is monitored and recorded.
I have half the company’s banking, social media and personal email account info and passwords. I know who is secretly banging who at the office behind their spouse’s backs. I know who is cybering at work and jerking it in the bathroom almost daily. At least they tell their sex chat partner they’re running off to the bathroom to jerk it, haven’t felt the need to check the validity of that one. I know when people are having martial problems, financial problems, I even know one person here had their children taken away because a social worker found cocaine in their house. I know who is embezzling money, I know when people get fired for completely bullshit reasons (like they just want to replace them with someone younger and nicer on the eyes), and I know who my boss is buying xanax and vicodins from.
Basically I have a treasure trove of my coworker’s secrets. I won’t actively do anything with this info, but it’s nice knowing I have the ammunition there if something were to ever happen.
12. An Anonymous Email
There was a girl who I had a crush on the moment I saw her on my college campus. She ended up dating a douchebag dude a few weeks later. I happened to end up sitting in a study room with him and a few mutual friends. He talked about how he didn’t think she was that attractive and how he liked other girls. I wrote the girl an anonymous email using one of those websites telling her about the things I heard and how the guy was a dick. She ended up breaking up with him after she found out he was cheating.
The girl is now my girlfriend of 6 months. She has no idea (and is sitting across from me in the library). I’ve never told anyone this before.
13. Incest Abortion
When I was 15 my parent’s were going through a divorce, my mom worked night shifts and my dad was living with a friend of his. One night my sister who was 19 at the time came home pretty drunk from a party. She was acting goofy and fell on the couch next to me. She started grabbing my leg and laughing and we started fondling. We ended up having sex right there. When we woke up the next day she had no recollection of the night before so i just kept my mouth shut.
Fast forward to when I’m 18. Sister is home from college and dad is over for a visit. they get into an argument and in a fit of rage my dad announces how he has never forgiven her for the abortion she got when she was 19 and subsequently killing His grand child. (he’s very religious)
I then realize the baby she aborted was in fact mine…..and as far as I know, I am the only one who knows since she has never mentioned that night.
14. Accidental Half Incest
My daughter turns 5 next week. If anyone knew the truth behind her parentage, I could probably lose her forever.
I grew up in foster care, never knew my parents or siblings. In my senior year, I met an older guy and we dated for almost a year… getting pregnant about 7 months in. One night while we were watching tv, the subject somehow came around to our real parents (he had been adopted as a young child). Turns out the man I was seeing, the father of my daughter… is my half-brother… we have the same mother. Our relationship didn’t last, and he is not in her life, per his own choices.
My daughter is extremely smart, beautiful, and well-rounded. She’ll never know the truth… her father and I made a pact to never tell her. I just hope she never needs a kidney or something.
15. A Jealous Sister
I have a blind brother. When we were young, I used to get so frustrated at all the extra attention he received and how I had to be more responsible with my sibling than my peers. So, when my brother and I would go play, go to the store, or just generally go anywhere without adults, I would abandon him somewhere unfamiliar to him. Then, I would stand off quietly and watch the anxiety set in as he tried to figure out where he was and what was going on.
Also, I was really intelligent as a child and knew that was my ticket to attention. When I would “help” my brother with his homework, I would teach him all the wrong answers, so that I could continue being the smarter sibling. Today, my brother is my best friend. He goes to college and lives by himself. He’s become one of the most intelligent men I’ve ever met. I’m trying to make it up to him now by being the best big sister ever, but I still feel so guilty at how I found him to be a burden when I was a kid.
16. One Simple Mistake
I accidentally killed seven people.
I put a rag into a new water heater exhaust to keep debris out and installed it in a rental.
I get a call a week later, there’s been an accident. I show up and there’s a ton of EMS and police. They ask me where the gas shutoff is, and I go down to shut the gas off and see the end of the rag I forgot sticking out of the top of the heater.
Ripped the rag out, shut the gas off and head upstairs only to be told all the tenants were DEAD.
I drink all day now and sleep. It’s killing me from the inside every single day, but if I say anything my family is ruined; we have a bunch of rental properties and we’d be shut down.
17. Scared To Be Alone
I hate all of my friends. Literally. I don’t have anything in common with any of them, and don’t care. But I’m too scared to be alone and have no one else to go to so I keep hanging around with them.
18. School Shooting
I came very, very close to committing a school shooting
I was picked on A LOT in high school. I think it was because I tried so hard to be cool and everyone saw right through it. There were these 4 cowboy jock types that gave it to me the worst. After being publicly humiliated and beaten in front of a girl I liked (as she laughed/cheered), I decided that none of it was worth it anymore. I had no support at home being an only child and having parents that worked constantly, and cutting and burning myself didn’t make me feel better anymore. So I got my dad’s handgun out of the gun-safe (he uses the same combo for everything, the idiot) and brought it to school with me the next day.
I can’t adequately describe to you how ready I was to kill these four. I had absolutely no fear or doubt in my mind. I wanted nothing more than to show everyone what happens when you push someone over the edge like they did. I had the gun tucked in my waistline. I was wearing this baggy pair of cargo shorts that I wore a couple times a week that day. I remember walking towards the cowboy’s table, so goddamn ready for it to be over, when the gun fell out of my waistline, down my left short leg and made the loudest fucking sound as it hit the cafeteria floor. I tried my best to grab the gun real quick, but people saw what it was and screamed, and one of the instructors tackled me to the ground.
They eventually concluded that I had brought the gun to school to impress people with badassery, and had no intention of using it. I was expelled and sent to live at a youth ranch in Idaho until I was 18. I did have the intention of using it though. I was going to kill all of them. I’m 24 now, and I still think about it all the time. I have not recovered from high school. I’m still terrified of people in general, and avoid having relationships because of what I fear I’m capable of.
I’m not looking for pity. I know that what I did was wrong, it just feels good to tell the story.