6 Things You Can Learn From Your Terrible Job

1. EOD means End of Day…

…literally. I’m talking midnight. As in Hey! I know it’s 5:27pm, but if you could please have this budget ready by EOD on my desk, that I’m only just asking for now, that’d be great. And because there are still 6 hours and 33 minutes until the end of the day, this is apparently a perfectly reasonable request.

2. Getting promoted is an exciting new opportunity…

…to take on more and more responsibilities, and without losing any of your old ones either! Isn’t that exciting? Now you can serve as a full-time operations coordinator, and still retain the responsibility of sitting at the front desk, answering menial phone calls and making coffee for clients!

3. Professionalism is important…

Even if the president of the company calls a staff meeting and tells everyone tales of stealing an innocent bystander’s debit card for gambling money and buying strippers breakfast while in Las Vegas last weekend. Remember to always stay professional, okay??

4. Be prepared for meetings…

…give or take — oh I don’t know — 12 hours in advance? Just because the meeting was scheduled for Monday at 6:30pm, that is no excuse to not have those financial reports ready to present by Monday at 9:07am. That’s more than enough time to be prepared. That’s SEVEN WHOLE MINUTES of being at work after being out of the office all weekend. There’s really no excuse.

5. Know what is expected of you…

Otherwise you might be caught off guard – and might even be a little confused or angry – when your boss calls you on a Saturday to tell you that you need to pick up one of your superiors at LAX at the crack of dawn the next morning. Yes, Saturdays and Sundays are technically the weekend, but no that doesn’t mean you have off. Don’t be silly.

6. And perhaps the most important: know when to quit.

Realize when you’ve learned all the lessons you can learn from this terrible job, be grateful for having learned them, and get the hell out of there.