The Super Bowl XLVII Drinking Game
1. Every time you hear the name “Harbaugh” take a sip.
2. Waterfall drink throughout Ray Lewis’s introduction dance in its entirety. (This is the last one of his career, so you’re in for a lengthy treat.)
3. If a picture or video of the Harbaugh’s as children is shown, take three big gulps of something you considered no-no juice as a kid.
4. Whenever a funny Super Bowl commercial comes on, take a sip, but more importantly, Tweet or Facebook about it.
5. Drink anytime Ray Lewis is seen screaming – even if it’s unclear whom or what he’s yelling at.
6. Take a shot if Ray Lewis mentions or recites a bible verse.
7. If the Baltimore Ravens score a touchdown, finish the drink in your hand.
8. If the San Francisco 49ers score a touchdown, either pour some out for your fallen homies (the Atlanta Falcons and my beloved Green Bay Packers) or take 49 sips for yourself.
9. Drink anytime Ray Lewis is seen crying.
10. Do a bro-tastic Jägerbomb every time Colin Kaepernick does his trademark bicep kiss.
11. If a Harbaugh is seen complaining to the refs, chug a glass of wine (Get it?! Whine).
12. Every time there’s a turnover, take a sip of the drink from the person next to you.
13. Every penalty flag must be followed by 10 straight seconds of drinking.
14. If poor Alex Smith (the QB who was replaced by Kaepernick after a concussion) is shown on the sideline, drink a few big gulps – hell, he probably could use a beer himself at this point.
15. If a GoDaddy.com commercial features some type of woman and her lady parts being exposed, drink.
16. When the announcers use phrases and words like “penetration,” if you’re the first one to say, “That’s what she said,” make the person of your choice to drink.
17. If Destiny’s Child performs “Bootylicious” take a break from drinking to enjoy the halftime show.
18. Three drinks if Jay-Z makes an appearance.
19. If the Raven’s defense scores a touchdown via Ray Lewis, drink. No set amount, just drink until it feels right.
20. When the game is over, make a new drink and chug it, whether the team you were rooting for won or lost.
A | A | A
And I got what I wanted — a dream arrangement that allowed me to live my life without compromises.
3. We hide behind our screens.
Lack of religious affiliation does not mean lack of morality.
1. When people act one way on Facebook, and another way in reality.