10 Sunday Problems
1. Choosing between the wide arrays of your favorite movies being shown all over cable/satellite television. 300 is on TNT, Knocked Up is on E!, Superbad is on FX, Mean Girls is on TBS, Freedom Writers is on MTV, Half Baked is on Comedy Central, Home Alone is on ABC Family and your fingers are getting an intense workout, flipping between multiple channels. It requires far too much thinking and decision making for a Sunday, but it’s a good problem to have. Have you ever gone from “Four for you Glen Coco!” to “THIS. IS. SPARTA!”? I have, and it feels pretty good.
2. Having a truly unfortunate craving — a taste for Chick-fil-A on a Sunday. This is the one day of the week that they’re closed, and when a person really wants/NEEDS some waffle fries and quality chicken in their life, this is kind of the place to get them from. WHY TASTE BUDS? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME? TO US? Here’s a 10-piece chicken nugget from some cheap fast food joint. These will not be eaten quickly. You will not enjoy them – they are Burger King.
3. Sleeping for the majority of the day, leading to a sluggish, lazy afternoon/evening. Yes, sometimes oversleeping and getting too many Zs has the same effect as not getting enough – turning you into a tired, unproductive bump on a log.
4. If you’re busy working or you live on the West Coast, trying to avoid the East Coast watcher’s spoilers of your favorite Sunday evening TV series’ is a tough task that requires a conscious effort. Things like steering clear of Twitter and Facebook for a few hours are a norm amongst television buffs that don’t catch their beloved series’ when they air live. TIVO is your hero, but social networks are its kryptonite.
5. Spending the early part of the day still drunk from the previous night. Sometimes this means remaining in bed longer, other times it means getting up close and personal with your bathroom floor and toilet. It’s really unfortunate if it’s the latter, because the only thing worse than wasting a day is dry heaving as the hours tick away.
6. Trying to stave off your fear of tomorrow. It’s natural to get preoccupied with dreading Monday, so much so that you forget to take advantage of and enjoy your Sunday.
7. Having NFL withdrawals and missing football dearly. Even if the season is going on, the problem changes to stressing out entirely too much over fantasy football, or the outcome of games involving highly paid professional athletes, who’ll probably be over their losing before you will. The life of an emotionally invested football fan rarely sees a care free Sunday.
8. Dealing with the fact that Sundays are somehow capable of finding a way to go by entirely too fast, but also feeling like they were a slow, dragged out, boring process. It’s a weird mystique that no other day of the week has, which can sometimes make Sundays feel flat out depressing.
9. Seeing social networks flooded with updates and pictures of your friends and acquaintances Sunday Funday, which always seems so much more epic and elegant than the ones you’ve taken part in. Don’t worry though, pictures of Bloody Mary’s and Mimosas always look cooler, and far more appetizing when seen through Instagram’s Brannan filter.
10. Spending your Sunday hastily trying to complete the errands, to-do lists and homework that you’ve been putting off all weekend. In your defense, the elite members of the procrastination nation will be waiting until Monday morning, or Tuesday, or Wednesday – or whenever the absolute very last minute arrives. #SundayProblems.
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Nobody actually expects you to act like an adult for a while.
“What are you going to do with an English degree?”
I’m finding it hard to muster any sympathy for this asthmatic leatherneck. Instead, there is only contempt.
He noted that during trial, the women (we made up three out of the four mockers) mumbled to ourselves in between questioning witnesses.