6 Positions Your Heart Can Be Broken In
1. On Call
It’s hard to say no sometimes, especially when the request is coming from a person you have feelings for. Whether it’s lust, like or love, they have a tight grasp on your emotions and when they come calling, you can’t even spell “no.” Sure whenever it’s you sending texts and invites to spend time, you get blown off, but that won’t matter or persuade you to resist. Short notice? You’ll still be there in a heartbeat.
The worst part is the regret afterwards. You spent time when it was convenient for them even though you know damn well that they aren’t willing to return the favor in the future. Hopefully the quick fix is worth it because now the person you’re addicted to is gone and you have no idea when you’ll get your next injection of their attention to ease your burning habit.
You’ll convince yourself that next time will be different. Next time you’ll be stronger. Because you deserve better. Really, you probably do. But then that day will come and you’ll be tested as the opportunity to say “no” will present itself. The phone rings. You answer. They summon you. Can you be over in 15 minutes? And before they can even finish the sentence you’re hastily scrambling through the closet to figure out what to wear. On call and at someone else’s disposal is never a good idea and its chances of a happy ending must be on a diet because they’re super slim.
2. A Dead End
This is typically a point that only couples or exclusively dating folks can reach. Its causes can be just about anything. Different life goals, a lack of trust, an inability to communicate, sheer laziness. Whatever the case may be, driving slowly towards the dead end that you know damn well is approaching isn’t wise to say the least. That means you’ll be rolling with the punches despite the daily stress they cause you.
If you feel thoroughly unhappy with your current situation’s vegetative state, it’s best to act fast. The longer it’s dragged out the more difficult it will be when the dead end is inevitably reached. Things’ll come to a screeching halt in unpleasant fashion and even though it was a misery, you’ll miss it because it went on so long that it became oddly comfortable.
3. Solo And Seeking
Nobody wants to call themselves desperate and perhaps that’s too strong of a word to describe anxious or eager hearts, but when you’re feeling lonely or over the whole being single thing you’re susceptive to these urges. Essentially you’ll lower your standards or settle for less simply so you don’t feel like you’re living life on a deserted island with Wi-Fi. The specific people you normally wouldn’t involve yourself with if you weren’t feeling particularly bored/alone shouldn’t change. Most of the time your standards filter out people who have no business being a substantial part of your life.
If you haven’t already, don’t. Seriously, pump your breaks, flip around and head in the opposite direction. People involved in relationships are the last thing that’ll do your heart any good. If it’s a fascination because you want what you can’t have, that’s something you need to seriously stop doing. In the event that these are genuine, real feelings, like you actually care for their wellbeing, then you’re in trouble. It’s not your job to care for them; it’s somebody else’s. Yes, you want their spot, but no, you can’t have it. They’re not accepting applications, sorry. His/her heart is fully staffed and you’d be foolish to waste your time applying for positions at a place that isn’t even hiring. Also, if they take every moment away from their relationship to tease and string you along, grab your metaphorical scissors and snip that tie.
5. The State Fair
Because let’s face it, where else are you going to find that much greasy, fried, heart attack inducing sh-t? Funnel cakes, fried Oreos, fried Twinkies, fried Coca-Cola, chicken-fried Bacon. It’s the only form of a damaged heart that’s guaranteed not to leave a bitter taste in your mouth. (Hey, it might be more of a literal danger but it certainly counts.)
6. In Love
If we’re ever going to give someone you’re all, you’ll have to put yourself at risk. That’s right, it’s the hopeful but terrifying position that, when treated poorly can cause people to do crazy things. It’s a full blown gamble in the sense that you’re trusting someone else with a huge amount of power over your general mood and daily emotions. Letting them in, giving them the blueprints to your innermost makeup. Your likes, dislikes, strengths, weaknesses, preferences, pet peeves – it’s going to result in something beautiful or traumatizing. That’s the jeopardy we’ve got to put ourselves in if we ever want to experience something special. All we can do is use our best judgment and hope that a potentially dangerous position turns out to be an extraordinarily happy one.
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Be the girl who knows how to choose her battles wisely. Be the girl who will fight for what she believes in, but not fight for the sake of fighting.
What I have to say, what she will never say, is that you absolutely need to back off, now.
Not many twenty-somethings want to be “tied down” before 30, but many of us also crave something less superficial than a series of one night stands.
It was years ago, and I still struggle to describe it; I suppose that’s how you know it was true love.