5 Text Messages That Are The Worst
1. The Waiting On An Important Reply, Then You Text Me, Text. Whether it’s a crush’s retort to your date request, a friend relaying extravagant gossip, or some other scenario in which you’re anticipating receiving an important text — the waiting is emotionally challenging. When you’ve done your part in sending a crucial text that elicits a response, it’s all sweaty palms, nervous fiddling and anxiousness of the excited or uneasy nature. So if at some point within that pins and needles period we feel our phone vibrate, or make the text-indicating jingle — we’re hoping — no, we’re expecting for it to be our coveted reply. If you’re the individual responsible for the poorly timed text, just know that you’re being cursed and held accountable.
2. The “We Need To Talk” Text. We need to talk? Oh sh-t, what’d I do? Immediately after seeing or hearing that phrase, it’s impossible not to thumb through the files in our brain, trying to recollect all interactions with and wrong doings to that person. It can be terrifying, but often times the end result is anticlimactic. It’ll turn out that all “we need to talk” about is if you’ve heard that so-and-so cheated on what’s-her-name with blah blah blah.
3. The Drunken Text. Here’s the thing, this can be a hilarious form of text if it’s from a friend. The time when we loathe it is when it’s coming from a person we’re currently or formerly involved with in a romantic manner. Typically these messages are sent between the hours of 10 p.m. and 4 a.m., but those times may vary depending on the person. It’s just frustrating, whether you’ve moved on or have feelings for the person, to receive their intoxicated mindset and exaggerated thoughts. For example: i judst looive yyou n muiss u soo mucjh. Pls txct bacck PLEEASE!!1, is not the type of thing we want waking us in the middle of the night.
4. The Can I Pretend I Didn’t Get This Text. “Can you help me move?” is just one of the countless texts that we wish we’d never seen. Usually a favor is being asked, and we don’t want to be a bad friend, but we also don’t feel like lifting boxes and couches. In addition to service requests, the other texts that fit this category are unwanted invites. A text summoning your presence to a bar, club or dinner that you genuinely want no part of is always troublesome. You can politely decline, but you might be badgered for 10-20 more texts as you spew out the reasons and excuses as to why you can’t go. Or — you can just not respond, and risk awkwardness next time you run into that person. Tip: If they confront you, act shocked and be prepared to make false claims blaming your subpar cell phone service.
5. The Nothing Funny Was Said, “LOL” Text. This text, along with the succumbing to boredom “K” text, is the main way to end a text-versation without saying buh-bye. At some point along the way, LOL stopped meaning ‘laugh out loud’ and became ‘I’m out of sh-t to say.’ I personally don’t ever respond to a sole “LOL” text. To me this signifies a lack of interest, and serves as the abrupt closing ceremony of our discussion.
If you’re guilty of sending 3 or more of these kinds of texts habitually, you’re probably irritating and/or stressing someone out. Don’t fret, you can improve. Simply remove any of the conduct described here from your texting practices and you’ll see instant progress made. Good luck, and happy texting. On that note… LOL.
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Describe for us the threesome with your OKCupid hookup.
If this doesn’t become the biggest video on the Internet, then I have no faith left in humanity.
I’m about to finish up my sophomore fall of college, and friends from home are getting married and having babies and sufficiently freaking me out.
He was a perfect date. I later got drunk and hacked his phone (who uses their birth year for a password? It was 1986, by the way #teamcougar). What I found was a text to a Kristina explaining his aforementioned sex dream he’d had about her while sleeping next to me in a luxurious hotel bed.