August 2, 2013

100 Men On “Would You Date Someone Who Slept With You On The First Date?”

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What is the issue?
I was watching reruns of Millionaire Matchmaker this morning and Patti Stanger kept beating people over the head about not having sex before monogamy because “men lose interest” or whatever. I’ve heard that this is a crock, but I’ve also been in the presence of men who say women who do that are easy. In an attempt to put this question to bed (ha ha) I talked to 100 guys to see what they had to say. Tally at the bottom.

1. Jason, 26, straight

I would love to have sex on the first date BUT if it happens I will probably look at her in a different way. I like girls who can hold themselves and value themselves more than the average ones so when I’m with one I can feel that I have caught something rare or something hard to find.

2. Jonathan, 23, straight

No guys think like that, if the girl is awesome they will still like her.

3. Dallas, 38, straight

No! A dude loses respect for you if you let him–if you look unconfident or insecure or weak. Having sex too soon isn’t weakness, it’s powerful actually.

4. Adam, 28, straight

Na that’s not bad

5. Brian, 33, straight

I would and have! Wanna have a date?

6. Stephen, 26, gay

I think if you have a connection with someone you can for sure go all the way on the first date. If you have such a strong connection that it makes sense, go for it. Though my ex had a horrible end we hooked up the first night and didn’t stop hanging out for the next week straight.

7. Riley, 25, straight

My fiancée and I did!

8. Mike, 29, straight

I always enjoy sex on first date. I think communication is key.

9. Chris, 28, straight

I would continue to date her. If we are having sex on first date there is a real connection and that can only be built on, specially if the sex is good.

10. Rich, 32, straight

I would still go out with her, I guess, but she wouldn’t seem as hot.

11. Darren, 35, straight

My ex and I slept together on the first date and were together for 7 years.

12. David, 36, straight

It is VERY BAD you will never be respected by any guy you sleep with on the first date. I’ve been looking for two years to find a fun partner that loves to have sex but withholds it for a couple weeks. Tough to find when your mid 30s.

13. Shane, 40, straight

It really depends on the girl, but 9 out 10 I would not look at as girlfriend material.

14. Denny, 28, straight

I don’t think it’s horrible if both people click and there’s chemistry. I think it could be awkward first date, but if mood is right and both are horny, why not? :) We’re all human!

15. Jay, 36, straight

Mature men look for ladies. The sort of ladies who wait for quite some time to hop into the bed together. I have more respect for the hard to get woman than the common easy girl.

16. Andy, 29, straight

That’s not necessarily a bad thing as long as she’s honest and upfront with me. As a gentleman I always leave it up to the woman to decide if she wants to have sex or not.

17. Brian, 22, straight

If you really hit it off and enjoy each others company, why not! I wouldn’t think any less of her nor would she think any less of me.

18. Derk, 41, straight

That depends entirely on what kind of date it was or how strong the mutual feeling was. You can’t fight attraction plain and simple.

19. Chris, 25, straight

No they will have a few more dates as long as they can fuck you. Then they will blow you off. Just saying.

20. Anthony, 35, straight

I’ve had sex on the first date a couple of times and we ended up dating long term.

21. Johnny, 22, straight

I dated a girl for 3 years after we slept together on the first date.

22. Mark, 33, straight

Guys will fuck anything ———that is a fact ——— so what does that really say about the guy that thinks less of the lady if she just does what any guy would do?

23. Stephen, 48, straight

I can only relay my experience, I had sex with a girl on the first date, moved her into my home the next day, lived together for 7 years, then married for another 10…..So together for 17 years total. A beautiful daughter who is now 15.

24. David, 32, straight

If you are attracted to that person I don’t see anything wrong with it.

25. Mike, 34, straight

I think it totally depends on the situation. If I get the vibe that’s all she wants, then I’ll go along with it and sleep with her, and we practically use each other for sex. If it seems like she wants more and the chemistry felt right to have sex, then I would let her know I want to see her again and see how she responds.

26. Kris, 24, straight

That’s the only way I would see her again

27. Ben, 28, gay

I don’t mind hooking up on a first date although sex sex… maybe wait until the chemistry is there. But, if I do have sex I would not think necessarily that they were not boyfriend material ESPECIALLY if the sex and hookup was good because a boyfriend is really just a close friend that you fuck.

28. Owen, 27, straight

That would be bad. Sex is a conquest thing, if you sleep with him on the first date. He doesn’t have anything to look forward to from you from there. Will probably leave you in the dust.

29. Rick, 29, straight

I don’t think I’d think anything less of the woman, but personally, I’d have to have one good, long first date for sex to happen, not just dinner and a movie. Maybe hanging out afterwards, a walk late at night through the quiet city while talking about whatever.

30. Jason, 23, straight

No, It is not bad and yes, I would see her again if we enjoyed each others company.

31. Aaron, 36, straight

Ehh if I knew her for a long time and she was a real friend then okay. If I just thought she was cute and cool might keep dating her but just so I’m not bored and I would not be expecting a real relationship just someone to be with for as long as it lasts. And if I thought she was hot and that’s all she had going for her then i might just keep her for sex.

32. Bill, 25, straight

I guess that depends on how the girl feel and acts about it.

33. Aric, 28, straight

It can go either way I would never think less of a girl but I think rushing into sex can hurt in the long run it all depends on the connection.

34. JJ, 21, straight

Only if the guy is shallow. He did it too.

35. Dustin, 50, straight

I did that…ended up marrying her….28 years ago.

36. Randal, 37, gay

Sex is a normal adult interaction.

37. Rob, 26, straight

The thought is hard to shake – would she sleep with anyone?

38. Jason, 31, straight

If you go out with a guy, few drinks and some laughs and you’re both not just stupid drunk then I think sex is ok on the first date.

39. Ryan, 28, straight

If there is chemistry, your feeling each other than why deprive yourself of something that you enjoy.

40. Jon, 26, straight

It would not stop me from dating her. In fact, most of my Gf’s have been that and they have been long term relationships.

41. Kyle, 23, straight

From a personal perspective I believe you should taste the “milk” as they say before buying the cow!

42. Thomas, 29, straight

I’m no expert but in most all my situations I have found if I have sex with them I usually end up dating them.

43. Lee, 22, straight

No there isn’t anything wrong with sex on the first date. If two people are attracted to each other why shouldn’t it be acceptable? That’s the problem with people today, its ok for guys to sleep with whoever they want and as many different women as they want but if a women does this she’s wrong. WHY?

44. Lucas, 35, straight

No it’s fine I’d love it, and could be more fun the next time.

45. Justin, 33, gay

Sex is just another way of connecting and entertaining. For one person to choose whether or not they would like to continue getting to know someone they just met depends on their expression both physically and mentally.

46. Nes, 31, straight

I would think more of her if we had sex before the date.

47. Matt, 34, straight

If the connection was there then yes I would date her. However, I go out expecting nothing more than a possible goodnight kiss on the first date if I really like a girl.

48. Adam, 25, straight

I’d have more respect for a woman who had sex on the first date because she wanted to than I would for a woman who wanted to, and didn’t, because of some outdated social convention.

49. Rick, 26, straight

Absolutely, if you want to. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being a sexual creature. After all, we all have needs; there’s nothing wrong with meeting them, as long as you’re being safe about it.

50. Bobby, 24, straight

Yeah, happens half the time on first dates. At least ones I’ve had.

51. Charlie, 33, straight

I’ll still date her. It goes both ways.

52. John, 27, straight

Yes the guy will come back. If the sex was good we will be back, but that is why he keeps coming back.

53. Tommy, 27, straight

Nothing wrong with sex on the first date. My ex wife and I had sex on the first date and it was mostly a good relationship.

54. Brandon, 32, straight

I have slept with three different women the first time we met, they all became long-term.

55. Mike, 28, straight

It depends on the sex.

56. Scott, 39, straight

Absolutely not- a sexual connection is just as important as an emotional one.

57. Nate, 30, straight

I think it shows how well you guys connect and then you should continue to date.

58. Eric, 38, straight

If you have an encounter with an immature guy that you don’t really know, they could take it as an “easy score” and bail shortly thereafter. Doesn’t seem like men really mature sexually until around 30.

59. Jake, 28, straight

It just means you had a great time.

60. Jason, 27, straight

Sex is always fine if both people are willing and understand that it doesn’t imply commitment. I’ll never think less of a woman that moves that quickly. In fact, I’d respect her a bit more if she was mature enough to accept that there’s nothing wrong with adults (even strangers) having sex just for the fun of it. I’ve had some fantastic times that way!

61.James, 32, straight

Unless she was just awful in bed, I would definitely get together with her again and not think less of her.

62. Zack, 29, straight

No, I would not think less of her. Nor would I be upset if we did not have sex on the first date. Sex isn’t the big mystery and taboo that it once was. Sex is what two people do to help each other feel very good.

63. Casey, 34, straight

That’s only a factor if you’re still living in a fantasy victorian era, or you’re religious. The most amazing girls I’ve had long term relationships with were the ones that had sex on our first date.
Personally I find it progressive, assertive, and just plain hot and attractive when a girl isn’t hindered by what anyone thinks and does as she wants.

64. John, 25, straight

Hell life is short. There is no wrong.

65. Cory, 20, straight

I had sex with my last girlfriend on our first date. We dated for 5 months and it was wonderful.

66. Rob, 26, straight

Well, if she had sex with me on the first date, that means I had sex with HER on the first date also. Hard to condemn someone for something you participated in.

67. Joel, 48, straight

It’s trashy. Those kind of women have an entitled I want it all right now attitude, especially urban citified moronic liberal women.

68. Trevor, 25, straight

No, it’s a huge turn off if I can get her into bed that easily.

69. Mike, 30, straight

I’d probably just wanna continue to fuck her, not “date” her.

70. Mark, 29, straight

Depends on the sex. It better blow my mind.

71. Adrian, 21, straight

If I am attracted to her yes I would date her again. If I was just horny then no.

72. Nate, 31, straight

I personally would not think less of someone because they slept with me on a first date. If it was someone I was really attracted to and wanted to get to know better, I may decide to wait just because then there is still some mystery and intrigue.

73. Cameron, 32, straight

I don’t think it is a bad thing but many women I dated felt otherwise.

74. Joe, 23, straight

It’s actually a great sign that you both would like a second date.

75. Sal, 25, straight

I have a guy friend of mine who went on a date with a girlfriend of my wife, they slept together on their first date and she decided she couldn’t respect him because he slept with her on their first date.

76. Andy, 25, straight

I have definitely not wanted to talk to someone later because they acted a certain way, and we slept together. I also know guys who are just looking to get laid and do this all the time.

77. Jason, 39, straight

I’m dating someone currently who I am very into and we slept together the first night. It just felt right, and we were into each other. I’d say be realistic about what you want and what he wants, as much as you can know. And don’t let society sexually shame you. There is nothing wrong about having sex with someone you just met and not speaking afterwards. It does not implicitly diminish the experience. If you want to and choose to sleep with him, enjoy it, and have fun, and keep it as an enjoyable memory in your head.

78. Jon, 31, straight

Most guys wouldn’t think less of you for having sex on the first date. The only thing that would change that is if you kicked him out right after sex or you ignored or avoided him after that.

79. Mark, 27, straight

I’d like to just get it out of the way since sex would happen later. I don’t think it affects a relationship at all.

80. Matthew, 25, straight

I might ask her to marry me.

81. Carl, 36, straight

My last two relationships started with sex on the first date.

82. Trygve, 29, straight

Why not? That just shows you know what you want.

83. Paul, 27, gay

That usually makes a guy more dateable in my eyes.

84. Adam, 28, straight

This has happened to me. I liked it and I thought nothing less of her.

85. Trey, 32, straight

Just because she enjoys sex doesn’t mean she’s a whore.

86. Peter, 28, straight

No guy cares. In fact, he is probably more likely to see you if you have sex with him on the first date because it means he’s getting something out of it as opposed to just wasting his time.

87. Frank, 23, straight

That is an outdated concept. If the sparks are there let the fire burn.

88. Shawn, 19, straight

Actually I would then think of her as a GF.

89. Evan, 27, straight

The guy will forever be thinking “How many times as she done that?”

90. Josh, 32, straight

I married a woman I had sex on the first date with.

91. David, 33, straight

Yeah, that’s bad, it means you’re a big time slut.

92. Bryan, 24, straight

That just means that she is a keeper or even marriage material at the least.

93. Rory, 30, straight

Actually I would prefer to date someone that is sexual and knows who they are instead of playing the time game.

94. Alex, 31, straight

If a women is willing to have sex with no charge or prize in mind then she’s open-minded.

95. Justin, 28, straight

Why wouldn’t you want to find out right away if there is sexual compatibility?

96. Ross, 25, straight

That kind of beginning doesn’t bode well for the girl.

97. Brad, 31, straight

I did it recently this spring. Did not expect it at all, but we were having such fun it just happened. We did it a few more times over the next couple of weeks before breaking it off. She told me she felt bad about how fast we went. I thought it didn’t matter. I’d like to think it doesn’t matter, but I have to wonder if we would be in a relationship now if we had waited.

98. Adam, 23, gay

I don’t think that’s really a question for gays.

99. Tony, 27, straight

No, guys do the same and their morals are not questioned.

100. Josh, 28, straight

The answer to your questions is yes. Sounds like a strong, independent woman to me. Do what you want in life, and if someone don’t like it, tell them to bend over and kiss your ass!

The tally:

Go for it: 75
Can’t turn a ho into a housewife: 17
#notclearon: 8 TC mark

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