April 10, 2013

The OkCupid Inbox Of Every 23-Year-Old Girl

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What is the issue?

Sounds like your mom is pretty awful.

Should have clicked on your profile way sooner . . .

You’re too beautiful to be on here. You must have so many guys chase you down . . . it’s not even fair . . .

Hey . . .

hi how r u?

I want you to sit on my face ;)

hey how are you? my name is stephen. i like to hang out watch movies play disc golf or video games and smoke. other then that all i do is work. hope to hear back from ya.

wanna chat? A+ profile

Please tell me you have jungle fever . . .

You don’t have any sled of confidence. I don’t believe your profile and I think that you ate wonderful at lots of things though they may not be what your mother thinks are appropriate. If I’m wrong then best of luck, but if I’m right how does coffee sound?

Life is patiently waiting for you.

Hmmm. . . I don’t know what to think about you based on your profile . . .

If you’d like to talk to a flirty, well endowed guy about cheese or whatnot, let me know.

Hi I love life I love beer, friends, Dave Matthews Band, O.A.R, hikes,

I’d love to talk about Ben Affleck with you over some drinks and then do bad things with you after ;)

Gorgeous pic :/ wud u sleep wit me on the 1st date

Hi. This is going to get very personal very quickly, but I want to be honest and honesty is important. I want to be dominated and I was wondering if you would be comfortable with that, bossing me around and dominating me. If you’re interested let me know. I think you’d be really good at dominating me. Sorry if this creeped you out but if I were you I would take it as a compliment. Don’t be offended.

i need sum new freinds u seem cool whats up ur hot . . .

Do you like to be on top? Do you like to do it in public

Where can I send you flowers?

What is your bra size? I’m curious because I only date C cups.

Do you work out? You’re so athletick..

I think we would stop the world together

Hey how are you? I’m good I’ve seen better days. I hate my day job I work in insureance but it pays the bills and I have fun, drinking with my buddies. I love beer pong lol. It seems like you’d be fun to party with let me know if you want to hang out sometime

Hello there! I’m a nice guy. I love my family and country music. I’m saving myself for marriage, just thought you should know that about me.

Have you ever listened to Kanye West? If you like his body of work we’re a perfect match! If you’ve never heard of him don’t bother responding.

I’m not a psychiatrist, I work in construction, but I think your very self-conscious and I don’t understand why. I can tell by your pic that you are gorgeous but something is telling me that you’re heartbroken and don’t open yourself up to anyone and I’d like to change that. I hope you open up to me, I think what we’d have would be really great.

Are you prone to pregnancy scares? TC mark

Carrie Wittmer

Carrie is a writer and shark sympathizer. You can read her important thoughts about things like cheese and Don Draper …

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