Thought Catalog
April 7, 2017

For The Girls Who Care Too Deeply About The Boy Who Doesn’t

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What is the issue?
I’m Priscilla

This boy could be close to you. He could be your best friend. Your boyfriend.

This boy could not even know your name. He could be someone you have a fascination with. He could be anybody. Nonetheless, you care too much. And he doesn’t.

You, girls, you are the strong ones. You are the patient ones.

Patient for what? Nothing. You know that you won’t get anything out of waiting but all you do is wait and wait and wait. You wait for this boy to come around or for him to see you the way you see him. 9 times out of 10, he won’t.

You, girls, are the ones that should be searched for the most.

But you’re normally hiding…because you’re waiting. You won’t let yourself have fun without another guy. You won’t let yourself think about having another crush. You’ll yell at yourself if you find your eyes wandering to the cute boy on the street with a nice smile. You’ll scold yourself if you pay a lot of attention to a celebrity in the magazines. You’ll repeat to yourself “no” several times a day.

And for what? What is the point of all of it? What is the point of trying when he couldn’t care less? What is the point when he would rather sit and watch movies than hold a conversation with you? When he doesn’t give you straight answers to any of your questions? When he doesn’t pay any attention to you when you’re right in front of him?

When all you do is watch his face, waiting for it to turn to look at you, to say something to you, something…but all he does is look forward? When every time you give all of your care, he throws it on the ground like a littered piece of garbage?

The answer is, there is no point. This boy does not care.

Isn’t that obvious enough? Can’t you just LET HIM GO? We’ve been asked that question, or told that advice too many times to count. Yet we constantly find ourselves back in the same position. Why? You, girls, you care. When you care so deeply for someone, nothing can destroy it. You constantly find new reasons and excuses for him to stay in your life.

You keep this boy in your life, this boy who doesn’t care, all because you care too much. You’ve become attached and now nothing can fix it. You feel like you will forever be in the same exact position you are in right now. You will always be trying for this boy’s love, affection, care, attention, etc. and you won’t get it. All because he does not care nearly as much as you do.

I would say let him go from your life. Be free from the baggage he has left on you. Care for yourself as deeply as you care for him. Live and find someone who cares for you the same amount you care for them. This won’t last forever. I would say this, but I am the same as you, girls. I am one with you.

Instead, I say THANK YOU. Thank you for giving your love so generously and so deeply, with nothing in return.

Thank you for showing the pure beauty of how much a person can care for another. Thank you for being strong and persistent. Thank you for giving this boy care; he may not appreciate it, but I do. Thank you, girls, for being the people everyone in this world should be. I am forever grateful for you.

Take pride in all of your glory. Know that you are special. You are someone that most people would strive to be. You are gifted with a talent, and instead of hating yourself for it, you should appreciate it. I admire you.

So for the girls who care too much about the boy who doesn’t, I am proud of you. TC mark