I’m Married To The Internet
When I wake up, you’re the first person I think about. I always make sure to check up on you to see all the new things you have to offer, and I love the fact that you don’t care if I’m in pajamas, or that I haven’t brushed my teeth yet, or that my hair is a mess. I appreciate it that you always let me check Tumblr, or Twitter, or even Facebook, and you don’t judge me when a cat with a grumpy face makes me laugh for longer than it should.
Some people don’t understand our relationship. People say that I should give you space, that I should go outside once in a while. Well, I did that, but I decided to take you with me anyway. I loved that you were okay spending time with me in a little corner of the café, from time to time looking up to watch the passersby trying to imitate what we have.
Like any marriage, we have our rough times. Hey, do you remember that time after the storm when you went away for a week? You kept telling me that there wasn’t a connection or something like that. I was too distraught to even listen to you. I call that week the ‘Lost Week.’ I felt so disconnected from everything. I realized how much I truly needed you in my life. I found myself walking from coffee shop to coffee shop, hoping to just get a small glimmer of you; if I could just check if you had any messages for me, or any notifications of any kind, anything to fill the void.
After a week, you just reappeared again. We had so much to catch up on, so many things that we had missed out on. Being apart from you made the days feel longer, like I just didn’t know what to do with myself. I understand now that we may need to spend some time away from each at times, but our bond is so strong that it will never break. I mean, who else would know what Bruce Willis’s first name is, or where Anderson Cooper was born, or what year the Oprah Winfrey Show debuted? You spend countless hours with me looking up wonderful tidbits, and you never complain. Never.
It’s always nice winding down the day with you, even though you try your best to keep me from going to bed. You bring up silly videos that lead me into other videos, or random Wikipedia pages that take me somewhere else, and before I know it, it’s 4 a.m. and there goes my sleep. But I can’t get mad at you, it’s endearing.
It’s tough saying goodbye to you for the night, and I find that I make deals with myself: “Okay, at 4:15 a.m., I will shut you down… at 4:30 a.m.… 5:00 a.m.” Eventually, I do say goodnight. In the morning, when I awake, you’re right there besides me like you always will be. Oh internet, I always knew you were the one.
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Well I mean first of all, it’s never a good idea to approach a hot black girl with an opening line about how much you love chocolate!
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