(March 21st to April 19th)
You have no idea how to deal with your feelings or channel your emotions. You’re all over the place. Please do everyone a favor and CALM THE FUCK DOWN.
(April 20th to May 21st)
Everything doesn’t have to be your way all the time!! Just because someone does something differently than you doesn’t mean it’s wrong. Also, we get it – you’re independent AF (and no one cares).
(May 22nd to June 21st)
Please grow up. Seriously. Stop following everyone else around, stop changing your mind every 2 seconds and get a backbone. Going with the crowd doesn’t make you cool. It’s also not ‘cute’ to not know how to do anything for yourself.
(June 22nd to July 22nd)
Your sensitivity makes me want to SCREAM. Please, do everyone a favor and stop taking everything so damn personally. No one wants to be around someone who always feels like ‘poor me :(‘ and is constantly throwing themselves pity parties. The world sucks! Welcome, we’re glad you could make it!
(July 23rd to August 22nd)
Stop. Asking. For. Compliments. It is exhausting always trying to feed your ego and you smoother people for them. Compliments aren’t going to fill the voids in your life! And seriously, no one is going to give a fuck if your hair isn’t perfect.
(August 23rd to September 22nd)
Sorry hun but no one is perfect and no one is ever going to meet your insane expectations. Your personality in general just kind of sucks and that’s why you turn a lot of people off (pro tip: stop whining and complaining so much). Take it down a notch, princess.
(September 23rd to October 22nd)
Stop being so dependent and pushy. No one wants someone who is constantly up their ass. Take a breather and go figure out how to be alone for a little while. And deal with your feelings while you’re at it!!
(October 23rd to November 22nd)
I can feel your ego from here and I don’t like it one bit. If someone else has done it, you’ve done it twice and you’ve done it better. We get it, we also get why no one likes you (no one likes a liar). Please stop talking now.
(November 23rd to December 21st)
The world isn’t all about you and the day you realize that you will (maybe) stop being such a horrible person!! You are so painfully shallow.
(December 22nd to January 20th)
Capricorns are horrible people, honestly. Chill your temper, stop being so fucking lame and moody. Do you even have a good, fun side anywhere in you? You make me and everyone else so uncomfortable!!
(January 21st to February 18th)
You think you’re super cool and have it all together but you’re actually super lame. You need to grow up, stop pretending you’re still 18 and move on with your life. Responsibility won’t kill you!
(February 19th to March 20th)
Put down the bottle and try to love yourself a little (a lot) more. You’re ruining your own life and making yourself miserable because of your own decisions.