You hurt her hundreds of times, but she stayed and she fought for you because you were her world. She was always there for you because she loved you and the sad thing is she still does.
You thought she’d always be there like she’s been there for you before. You just assumed you could keep messing with her heart, putting her on the back burner and treating her how you wanted and she’d always be there.
But she finally left you like she should have done so many times ago and you finally realized how badly you fucked up to let a girl who would do anything for you go.
How does it feel that she finally discovered her worth, that she finally mustered up the strength to walk away from you and leave you behind? How does it feel to know she’s living without you and doing just fine?
I know it doesn’t feel good because now the tables have turned and you’re left with the hurt you’ve left her with so many times.
Now you’re the one who is blowing up her phone and getting angry that she isn’t answering you. Now you’re the one who is apologizing for finally realizing how much you fucked up because she finally left you. Now you’re the one who is begging for her attention like she’s had to do to you so many nights.
It took her leaving you for you to realize how much she was worth and that’s not how it works.
You know she’s got a passionate heart and she loves you but that doesn’t mean she should just give into you because you’re having a sudden realization that you fucked up beyond belief. It doesn’t mean you can just come back into her life after weeks of dragging her heart around and keeping her waiting on nothing. It doesn’t mean you can dictate the relationship the way you want it to be.
In case you forgot you were a dick, you’re the reason she left. You drove her away. You called her names, you took advantage of her heart, you only wanted her around when it was convenient for you. Don’t you remember all of that?
Don’t you remember her trying to save your relationship with everything she had in her? Don’t you remember her begging you to try to make it work, to just talk about things? Don’t you remember her doing all those nice things for you that you wanted no part of? Don’t you remember how easily you changed your attitude towards her, completely messing with her head?
And now that she’s gone you’re realizing how much you fucked up. It’s pathetic, really.
Now that you’re feeling a little bit of pain, a little bit of what she’s been feeling for so long you realize you were wrong all this time and you think you can just come back into her life. That’s not okay. That’s not how it works. That’s not a relationship, that’s a convenient-ship and no one has time for that.
You can’t just come back into her life and screw up all the progress she’s made without you. You can’t just come back because it’s a convenient time for you. You can’t just destroy her world all over again.
You had your chance, you had plenty of chances for that matter and you just kept pushing and pushing her further away until she remembered how to walk on her own without you. And she did. She said goodbye and now you can’t accept the fact you lost the best thing in your life.
She gave you so many chances to do right and you kept doing wrong. You kept stringing pretty little words together until she finally realized that’s all they were, until she finally could see through the bullshit you were feeding her.
And now she’s gone for good and you have no one except yourself to blame for that because she’s actually realizing just how much better off she is without you.