Alan Hanson is a writer in Los Angeles, CA. His most impressive skill is how quickly he can move through crowded environments. When he's not eating burritos or thinking about Gwyneth Paltrow he likes to pretend that E.T. exists and is indeed his best friend. His essays and general nonsense comedy can be found here , his bursts of word-piss here, and when he's being serious he edits and contributes to the poetry blog Looked Like Laughing.