Is It Okay To Hate Pigeons?

Every morning I awake to the sound of a pigeon trying to make its way into my house by idiotically ramming itself into the tiny crack in my window that is right above the foot of my bed. So realistically speaking, there is no other way to make it stop trying, except to punch it. And it works. And I feel satisfied.

What It Feels Like To Be 29

Being 29 is wavering at the peaks of sex and sensibility — most of us have climbed one and not the other, while a fortunate few claim both as victories.