Thought Catalog
October 31, 2016

Beware Of The ‘Nice’ Fuckboy

Report This Article
What is the issue?
500 Days of Summer
500 Days of Summer

It’s not easy to keep up with the extensive personalities of guys you should steer clear from while navigating the hook-up generation. We have so many variations of the good guy and the bad guy, but what is even more confusing is when the guy is a mixture of the two.

He acts like a good guy, and perhaps deep down he is. He believes he is upfront and to the point, while also simultaneously playing games with sex being his primary motivation.

He’s all about his friends and the girl he is talking to or hooking up with comes last, and can easily be switched out for a number of different girls.

When he’s with you, he acts like a genuinely nice guy and wants your company. But when you part ways, that’s it for him.

If you see each other or happen to run into each other, you’ll interact or maybe go home with each other but other than that there isn’t much of an effort. It’s frustrating because when you are with this person it can feel really good while inadvertently sparking a sense of hope.

He isn’t a jerk and he isn’t rude. He doesn’t promise you things or set any expectations. At the same time, he makes you feel happy, only to ignite expectations that can never be met.

The nice fuckboy can make you feel great when you are with him, leaving you disappointed when apart. He can tell you he’s not looking for anything serious or make it clear it is just a sexual relationship and nothing past that. Without being formally rejected, you can feel heavily rejected.

Even though he isn’t choosing you, this doesn’t make him a bad person. He may act like a fuckboy for a number of reasons that are just out of your control. But that’s his problem.

Maybe he has commitment issues. Maybe he had a shitty past experience. Maybe he has trust issues. Maybe there is something going on with him that has nothing to do with you, and for that reason, it’s not your place to try and force your way through.

Even if he isn’t intentionally trying to hurt you, he is still hurting you. Don’t ignore this reality. The fact that he is hurting you, intentional or not is what you need to accept. You may feel like you can help him, change him, or even save him.

Guys will almost always have sex with you. If a guy believes they’ve done everything to make you aware that they aren’t looking for anything serious, they may feel like they have done everything they’ve needed to do on their end, avoiding any guilt for any attachment you may gain.

As hard as it may be to let go, you have to.

This is not a fulfilling relationship. You are setting yourself up for disappointment each time you talk to or spend time with the nice fuckboy. Holding on inevitably will block you from new potential relationships.

He may be a nice guy. But he’s not your nice guy. Stop wasting your time with the nice fuckboy. He’s not for you. There is a nice guy out there for you that will undoubtedly choose you from the start. TC mark

Read This