The 5 Types Of Draw Something Players
By Alia Gilbert
1. The Perfectionist Neat Freak
When you took your first whack at Draw Something, your stomach did a cartwheel and you broke a small sweat when you realized, “Crap. There’s no way my finger is as precise as my ball-point.” So, you do everything you damn well can to make sure your final drawing is as close-to-perfect as your deft fingers can manage. You may or may not have attempted to use a sharp object just to see if it worked better. You erase a lot. It doesn’t matter that they other person has to wait, the POINT, goddammit, is that the final product is reflective of your true artistic ability. You use all of the pen shapes and all of the primary colors provided. They’re there for a reason.
2. The IDGAF Artist
One shot, one drawing, and you’re done. Two minutes, tops. Why? Because YDGAF about this game. You downloaded it because everyone was like, “omigoddrawsomethingsooofun!” So you downloaded it, just for the hell of it. Just to humor your friends. And now you’ve got a few games going with your enthusiastic cohorts. As for your drawing tools, the smallest pen shape and the color black are your go-to — no self-respecting human has time to change colors or pens. Or erase. When you happen to mess up, you just cross it out. They’ll get it. You like a challenge, so sometimes you do three-coiners, but most of the time the one-coiners are the way to go. Quick. Easy. No nonsense. No arrows, clothed stick figures, trees or flowers. Details are for pussies. Just get’er done, and press the button so we can move along, people.
3. The Self-Conscious Quitter
Maybe it’s because you get bored easily. Maybe it’s because you have mild ADHD and stopped paying attention about 13 minutes ago. Or maybe it’s because somewhere, deep inside your soul, you are so incredibly and unbelievably embarrassed about your severely subpar 3-year-old, first-time-with-a-red-crayon sketches that you just can’t bear the thought of someone watching every creative finger swipe you make. Are you kidding me? People actually ENJOY this? To compensate for your self-consciousness, you a. never respond, shrugging it off completely and telling others that this Draw Something business is dumb or b. try it once, attempt to draw an owl, fail miserably, and write OWL in thick black letters over your pathetic scribble. Then, you attempt to joke about it. Laugh it off. And then never ever play again.
4. The Joker
As soon as you discovered that your opponent will see every move you make, you giggled mischievously inside, Pinky and the Brian style. So many funnies to be had, you thought. So many. It’s hilarious to mess with people and throw them off in clever ways, then draw a picture that’s decent so that they get it in the end. Draw, erase. Draw, erase. A penis here, a penis there. Maybe some wonky boobs. More penises. Then erase again. Maybe you’ll write a random word like “cactus” or “battleship” across the screen when what you’re actually supposed to be drawing is “paulyd.” Or maybe you’ll use all the colors to create an extravagant and detailed background before drawing a mailbox. Really, the possibilities are endless, and Draw Something is a playground for your brilliant and immature imagination to run wild.
5. The Highly Efficient Communicator
You really want the other person to guess your drawing correctly. And you also want to play by rules. It’s important. That’s how games work. All of them. The game of life works that way. So no words or letters or any form of linguistic gusto are used in your neck of the Draw Something woods. To ensure maximum guessability, you like to communicate as best you can by using things like arrows and symbols. You fancy yourself a digital Pictionary storyteller. And since you’re so goddamn good at telling your stories, three-coiners are always the way to go. Those challenges ain’t got nothing on you. For Taylor, you drew a girl with a guitar, then an arrow to the next scene, where you drew a girl with a guitar with an angry dude standing next to her with little exclamation marks coming out of him — a prime example of your storytelling capabilities. Imma let you finish, but… I need to go kick some more ass at Draw Something. No, but really.