Most of my clients are women, so I hear a lot about what they wish men would and wouldn’t do while dating.
This article was inspired by my clients, by all the men out there who are looking for love, and by my own dating trials and tribulations.
I’m sharing my top 8 dating tips that all men need to know from a woman’s perspective. Some might be pretty, some might be ugly, but either way they are real stories that women share.
1. If you say you’re going to call, just call.
This is just basic respect. If you say you’re going to call, please call. We have lives too, but if you tell us you’ll call us, chances are we’re excited about that. When you don’t follow through it shows that you’re flaky or you simply don’t care.
2. Act interested, but not too interested.
When out on a date, conversation needs to be a two way street. Show us you’re interested! There is nothing more boring than a guy who only talks about himself. Make sure to ask us questions and be interested in what we have to say. I have a friend who does gorgeous artwork, and when she showed the guy she was dating he just responded with, “Is that pen?” Come on! Be interested in our lives and what we do, but not over the top.
3. Chivalry is NOT dead.
Ok I know that we’re in the 21st century here, and I am absolutely an advocate for equality, but I refuse to believe that chivalry is dead. One thing my husband always does is hold the car door open for me. It’s such a small and simple act, but chivalry is a huge turn on.
4. If you’re just not that into us, okay, but please don’t suddenly get “too busy”.
Sometimes you’re just not into us. And vice versa. That’s okay. But please don’t play games. Even though it’s scary, the most masculine thing you can possibly do is to be honest with us. I have girlfriends who keep making excuses for a guy they like who is blowing them off because he is suddenly “really busy”. They want to believe it, but we both know better. We make time in our lives for something that is a priority. Just be honest if you don’t want to see us anymore.
5. Make plans and stick to them.
Nothing drives women more crazy than dating a guy who flakes out. Believe me, I’ve dated a few of them. Girls want a man who can make a plan and stick to it. If you have trouble about sticking to a date, then we’re going to question if you can make a commitment to us at all.
6. Take initiative.
Girls are attracted to a man who can show some leadership. Personally, I love when a guy takes the initiative. Whether that’s setting the date and picking the place, or leaning in for a kiss, show us you’re someone with a little initiative.
7. Put some effort into how you dress.
I’m not saying you have to get all dressed up, in fact, sometimes that shows you’re trying a little “too” hard. But if you’re going to take a girl out, especially if it’s the first date, put a little effort into your appearance. We like that!
8. Have confidence in yourself.
I understand that men have a tough time in the dating scene too. We all do. And often men need a dose of self-love just as much as women. So this last statement trumps all the other advice: have confidence in yourself. If you need a confidence boost I put together a free video series here. No matter who you are, what you look like or what you do, just be confident in that. Nothing is sexier than a man who knows who he is and doesn’t make excuses for it.