The worst feeling in the world? Falling in love with someone who is falling in love with another person.

You see their smile, painted across their face, beaming with light and hope and beauty, and your heart bursts because you wish you were the one who could have inspired it.

You hear words skip past their lips, language that is blanketed in happiness, and your chest caves in on itself, because you wish you were the name that they held so carefully within their mouth.

You see them wearing their awe like their favourite sweater, it is oversized and comforting, it is precious, and you wish you were the one to have put that warmth between their bones, you wish you were the one they could have chosen.

When you’re in love with someone who is not in love with you, it is the worst feeling on Earth. You are stuck between two worlds, you are stuck between wishing and wanting and always feeling like love is a word that will forever be on the tip of your tongue, something you cannot fully release from between your teeth. You always feel the weight of everything you want to give someone building within your ribcage, it only ever gets heavier and heavier, it only ever adds a thickness to your feeling, and all you can do is smile. All you can do is smile and hide it, because you’re falling in love — but you’re the only one that is falling.

Read more writing like this in Bianca Sparacino’s book Seeds Planted In Concrete here.