What Makes You Brave

Thirteen

You’re brave if you don’t feel compelled to say “I’m sorry” to someone who doesn’t deserve it. A lot of what we do is rooted in guilt so we’re constantly apologizing for things we shouldn’t be. Being brave would be foregoing the apology and risk coming off as an asshole to someone. You realize there are worse things in life than coming off as a jerk to someone you don’t like, right? You want everybody to like you even if you don’t like anyone. I get that. But the second you stop drinking the Kool-Aid, you’ll feel a thousand pounds lighter. And you’ll be brave.

You’re brave if you get naked in front of someone who might not know what to do with you yet. You’re giving them the pieces of the puzzle and just hoping and praying they can figure out how to put it together. “Please, please, please,” you’ll whisper to yourself, hands covering your body. “Please get the right answer. Please do the right thing. Please don’t make me hate myself after this.”

You’re brave if you’re able to get out of a situation that feels comfortably uncomfortable. You’re brave if you leave some form of love behind with no guarantees of ever finding something else. It might not seem like a brave thing to do — people have love, they lose it, and have the good sense to move on — but look at how many people there are in loveless relationships. They’d rather having something awful than nothing at all.

You’re brave if you don’t bottle shit up, if you tell people that you’re going through a difficult time and refuse to put a happy spin on it. You refuse to make things better for everyone else before you can make them better for you.

You’re brave if you honestly don’t give a fuck about what anyone else thinks of you. A lot of people claim to be like this (FrEE sPiRiTZZZZ) but the fact is that it’s nearly impossible to go through this life without caring how you’re perceived. Out of all my friends, I only know one person who is actually like this. It’s almost like something is missing inside her brain. It just never occurs to her that what she’s doing isn’t 100% the best. Her attitude is intoxicating. It’s sort of the reason why we were all drawn to Jersey Shore. Day in and day out, we are surrounded by people who are cripplingly self-conscious but then, all of a sudden, we meet a bunch of tacky motherfuckers who are convinced that the way they live is THE BEST. Admit it. We all wish we had an ounce of Snooki’s confidence.

You’re brave if you create something, anything, and send it out into the world. You’re brave if you don’t back down, even when there are tons of people giving you reasons as to why you should. Conviction, being unapologetic about who you are, running out of fucks to give: these things sometimes feel like they’re going extinct in our culture and that’s terrifying. The brave ones are what makes this world interesting. 

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