Things I Would Do If My Name Were “Benedict Cumberbatch”

once upon a time, thoughtcatalog was a place for eloquent, articulate, well-spoken “thoughts.” call me a literary conservative (sorry, gaby, for making you bear the brunt of this rant), but now, this site has become the xanga of the online literary world. shit’s weak and totally sans-gravitas. again, gaby, i apologize; i appreciate that you were just trying to have fun and be “silly” and admittedly, i am a bit drunk, but it just pains me to see something i once thought was a bastion of intelligent and trenchant literary dialogue degenerate to lists of name-based puns and half-assed pop culture commentary.

/rant.

srs drunk commenter is super srs~*

Dude, I totally get it. But I really think there’s room for both. If you look back in the archives, the last piece I wrote for this site was about almost watching someone die. I don’t think anyone is always one way or the other. Sometimes people want intelligent – which they do get here – and sometimes they want silly. This is called “Thought Catalog” which I interpret to mean a place for all kinds of thoughts. There have definitely been pieces on the site with very intelligent literary commentary – most recently Kate Zambreno on Marie Calloway which I thought was incredibly well thought out and thought provoking. I don’t think mixing silly in with the deep ruins anything. More likely, you could just pick and choose which you wanted to read and in the end, the site is more diverse – a “catalog.”

you’re right, gaby. i definitely consider the diversity of this site to be one of its few saving graces; perhaps the editors should update the “about” section and consider revising their mission statement. however, miss dunn, i would like to bestow upon you significant props, as you’re clearly experienced in dealing with not-so-constructive criticism in a markedly thoughtful and considerate manner. maybe my envy is showing, as i’ve more than once submitted pieces here to no avail. anyway, we cool, you’re not nearly as jive as i thought you’d be in your retort to my inebriated half-rantings.

Absolutely no worries. You might be the first Internet commenter to ever say “You’re right, Gaby” to me possibly ever. I hope you hold that honor dear! We cool, definitely.

hah, good shit.

ps: bettermeasureblog.com

hit us up if you’re down with writing “srs” essays having to do with social commentary; we (i) won’t be nearly as drunk in our (my) consideration of your pieces.

Using “sans-gravitas” and ”
admittedly, i am a bit drunk” in the same post kinda brings question to your credibility, doesn’t it?

dude, you’re totally right. you win 1 internets.

Wasn’t expecting a reply. I feel bad about criticising your writing on the back of one ‘silly list’. I guess number 9 did make me snigger a bit.

You commenters are so cute. No worries! We cool.