32 Things I Googled When I Was 13
1. How do you call Loveline
2. How long do braces take
3. What is French kissing
4. How to French kiss
5. How to get a boy to like you
6. When will I get boobs
7. When do people get their belly buttons pierced
8. Sum 41 hot guy singer
9. Can someone be pushed all the way into a locker
10. How to get out of gym class
11. When will I get boobs
12. What is a penis
13. Why are penises so gross-looking
14. Justin Timberlake REAL screen name
15. Who has been looking at your AIM profile
16. How do you tell someone you have a crush
17. What is the difference between a tween and a teen
18. Is this better than Ask Jeeves
19. What is the best way to kiss someone
20. Is the girl a ho if she kisses first
21. How to be on two AIM profiles at once
22. What do boys talk about
23. When will I get boobs
24. What happens if you don’t get boobs
25. Sexy women with braces
26. J.Lo’s lip gloss
27. What is high school going to be like
28. How to tell if a boy has a crush on you but doesn’t want to say
29. Curse words in other languages
30. When will I get boobs
31. Do boys only like girls who wear Abercrombie
32. How to buy Abercrombie online without a credit card.
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I had a number of other essays I wanted to write tonight. There were other topics that deserved attention, essays I humbly felt might shed light on the human condition, on the difficulties and odd experiences we all deal with on a daily basis. But here I am, writing a defense of pubic hair.
6. The Usual Suspects
When your audience is this big, how can you really “know” it?
Metaphorically or literally, you will be hungry. Hungry for something to do, somewhere to go, some point to getting up in the morning.