21 More Things I’ve Learned In My 20s
1. Take advantage of that open bar…unless you’re someone like me who has the tolerance of a four-year-old. Damn my genetics.
2. There are going to be good and bad people wherever you go. You can’t run forever.
3. Imagining your life as a sit-com makes 98% of bad situations better. Some days just f-cking suck. So pretend it’s Christmas.
4. Set your expectations low and your standards high (especially on dating).
5. Seeing and admitting your flaws is important. Mine? Extreme fickleness, uncontrollable anxiety, being overambitious and too self-critical, talking bullsh-t, overcommitment, blah blah blah. But self-reflection is key for personal change. What are yours?
6. If someone cares about you, they’ll make time for you. If they don’t, then they won’t. But with that said, no one can make time for you all the time.
7. Club Monaco dresses and Chanel makeup are not good reasons to be broke. But plane tickets, traveling, and new experiences are.
8. Knowing when and how to sound like a pretentious asshole is useful. But so is knowing your place.
9. There’s a huge difference between loving someone and being in love. And having a tumultuous and volatile love life is really not something to be proud of, although it can be fun at times…
10. If you’re going to give, then just give. Don’t expect anything in return.
11. Alone time is crucial. Dates with yourself are the best. Go sit at your favorite café for another hour. Have that bubble bath. Take the long way home.
12. Karma is very, very real.
13. Listen to advice, even if you don’t like it or it sounds ridiculous to you. (ex. “You should really try a yoga class.” “Are you kidding me…” Well, today, I tried a yoga class. And I liked it.)
14. Not everyone is going to like you. And that is perfectly okay.
15. Killing with kindness is approximately 99% more effective than being a bitch.
16. Being happy doesn’t mean never being sad.
17. The more people you know, the better. Keep meeting strangers and talking.
18. Every single person has a story. Every single person can teach you something new about something you know nothing about. And every single person can teach you something new about yourself. You just have to be open to it.
19. If you want to go to somewhere, then go. Be reasonable, and be smart. But the longer you think about it, and the longer you hold back, the more you are going to hate everyone around you, including yourself. You can’t wait for things to happen.
20. You really cannot change people, no matter how hard you try.
21. But you can change yourself.
You should like Thought Catalog on Facebook here.
A | A | A
Even as I write this now I am debating whether or not to erase it all together.
When I say I’m in love with you, I mean I love the story I can tell to my next lover, about my ex-lover, about how beautiful things were, how intense, how storybook, what a couple we were, and how you gradually, inexplicably, painfully, bit by bit, disappeared.
By John Howell
“I used to be afraid of failing at something that really mattered to me, but now I’m more afraid of succeeding at things that don’t matter.”
I was 24 and, while not gay, ever since college I had been getting more attention from gay men than from heterosexual women.
By Ed Herro