You Smell Like A Boy

gross.

As a lesbian, I find the smell of boys/men absolutely repulsive. Must be biological. 

ah, the smell of the thickness of a leg

The scent of a man is a make or break deal. And the older I get, the more I want them to smell like meat/man/sweat/sex/oils/grease/days old second hand smoke than something sterile or, worse, Axe. (Death to all Axe and those that think Axe should ever be worn in public.)

this is probably the best thing you’ve ever written. thank you for this.

You need to date dudes with better hygiene.

I’m impressed, Ryan :)

Sounds like a Taylor Swift song.I never even realised how much I don’t smell like rotting peaches.

Just reminded of a girl that would smell me every time we’d see each other. 

remember, you got some smelly bitches too

NOM

I use a deodorant from the Body Shop that smells like a sexy dude stereotype. Kind of the way I imagine Axe wants to smell, but fails horribly at. I like being a lady who smells like a little like a dude.

Much better to smell like a man than to smell like a fat sissy

SMELL THE POWER OF PRESENCE WITH THE ALL NEW RANGE ROVER “EVOQUE”

Nothing like man smell in the summer, Lynx deodorants mixed with sweat and all those pheromones, oh my!

Welcome back Ryan. Your REAL articles have been missed.

I smell my boyfriend every time I hug him. I always tell him he smells good, and when he asks “like what?” I always say “like boy.” This article is so spot-on. Ryan, I can’t give you enough props for all of your articles recently.

omg you made me want a boy more than i already did *sigh

ughhh scent, the most powerful memory trigger. Some boys scents make me so nostalgic I could fall to my knees

And as a gay man, I find the smell of women disgusting/fake. SCIENCE!

Your MHC smells incompatible with mine.

This is awesome

You sound like the bottom-y type.

Interesting and relevant article number 590 by Mr. Ryan O’Connell.

Whenever I smell degree deodorant I think of sex and then realize it is because an ex of mine wore it.

i love this article almost as much as i love the smell of boys.

As a bisexual, you haven’t really smelt enough women to judge have you? Statistics.

I literally stopped in my tracks at work the other day because I got a whiff of some kid who smelled exactly the way the guy I was in love with as a teenager smelled when we were 17. It was super weird and disorienting!

And as a person currently residing in a plastic bubble, I think the lot of you smell like germs and rot

Actually I was trying to make a comment against how we view men as only sexual subjects and never sexual objects, which our culture has a tendency to do, hence how we view female bodies as “naturally beautiful” and male bodies as “lumpy and gross”, even by people who are sexually attracted to men and not women.

they smell like dick

I remember my past lovers via the memory of scent; aftershave in the shower, A&F’s “Fierce”, fresh clean laundry, bedroom in the morning….
Scent is the most evocative of memory triggers, followed by music.

Nothing like a good biology reference to remind me to stop reading whatever insight Ryan O’Connell has and get the fuck back to my o-chem homework!

Ryan, I follow your articles.  I hate that you write things I’ve thought about.  This entire article made my stomach hurt from nostalgia (less sweet than bitter, in my case)  I can’t taste cherry-chap stick anymore without barely being able to stop myself from jumping in front of a car and dying right there.

I digress.
We would despise each other in real life.  We suffer the same inferiority complex.  I can read how you hide it.  It’s the exact way I do.  We lack shame, not social grace.  We avoid clichés like the plague.  I imagine that we would contend each other in real life for attention, despite how trivial it might be.  That’s not the point, it’s the principle.  We would endlessly insult each other during some poorly themed soirée (the only reason I would go, is because it would give me a reason to wear my sequin mask) with bitterly dry and passive aggressive sarcasm, though the hors d’oeuvre platter would be decent.  After the battle of wit became a disturbance, or by sheer coincidence we both stopped talking to simultaneously text that guy; you know, the guy who is miserably needy but convenient to talk to when you’re bored, we would accidentally grab  the same wine flute and spill it.  Hilarity would ensue, and of course two wine bottles later we’d end up entangled in a never before used sun-room/gallery, obnoxiously way too drunk for your friend’s boss’ annual masquerade-party.  Or.  Not.  We really aren’t that interesting in real life. No one else better understands why you’re so dissatisfied than someone who is just as dissatisfied with you. 

“We avoid clichés like the plague.”

hehehehehehehehehe

Well I agree to how yada yada males are sexual subjects, but they are increasingly made sexual objects too. Male female alike are “lumpy and gross” if they don’t meet the society’s standard of beauty(general assumption here). What I’m trying to say is, you don’t have to just lash out and generalise that all women smell disgusting and fake just to, I don’t know, prove your point in your second comment that I feel(correct me if I’m wrong) really has no link with your first comment.

This is true – I think the male body is a beautiful thing but straight guys use words like “gross” to describe the idea of looking at dicks. Personally, I can think of nothing better. (Assuming it’s a pretty one, obviously.)

oh yes, A&F Fierce. I went crazy for that shit in high school.

Obviously you haven’t smelled my boyfriend’s taint

The taste of her cherry Chapstick®?

Ah, how I do not miss the days of organic.  Organic lab was pretty cool.  I used to imagine I was a drug dealer during the caffeine extraction lab…a textile worker during the dye labs…a mirror maker during the Tollens’ test lab…but the fun just about ended there.