If We Could Be Boring

Please tell me this was written by a 17 year-old

Or they wake up early and see it and have the whole day when they’re not tired.
Can’t wait for you to read this 5-10 years later and laughing at yourself!

Well, this article is somewhat of a paradox, because in itself it answers it’s own question: yes, it’s possible.

“eating through packs and packs of cigarettes, letting our worries and reassurances slide out with the curls of smoke”….that’s really extreme. “normal” people in the Midwest don’t live at such “breakneck” speed.

I thought this was pretty good until I realised it wasn’t a piece of satire. 

*is* this the lamest thing I’ve ever read?

Will. not. take. bait.

The “boring life” in the Midwest or anywhere anxiom is tired. You make life wherever you go. First thing I look for whether or not someone is vapid: they think everyone else is.

Must . . . resist . . . urge . . . to join . . . Al Qaeda . . .

Maybe I’m just old, but nowadays, my idea of non-boring is traveling to places I’ve never been to, and pushing myself to overcome my fears so I could go scuba diving, spelunking, mountain climbing, parasailing, etc.

“There is something to those long, sweaty nights, whether we are moving our bodies against each other or eating through packs and packs of cigarettes, letting our worries and reassurances slide out with the curls of smoke.”

Believe me when I say that, THAT, too, could get boring fast.

I am sorry to disappoint, but the tags say:

 20-somethings, Boring, Getting Old, Youth

Yes, it is.

fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuccccccccccckkkkkkkk yyyyyyyyyyooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

This is a joke right? Cannot wait for this person to read this again in 5 years.

I stopped reading at “chillwave”.

Getting Old, Youth, What?

i just did kind of a “bark laugh” to that

Smoking is edgy, but EATING cigarettes? Goddamn.

If We Could Be Self-Involved.

this is just so bad.

this article makes you sound like every other person who possesses the nerve and narcissism to believe they are sooooo individual and precious. In other words, some of the most boring, unimaginative people who completely lack any sort of ability to see beyond his or her self. Pull your head out of it. 

i pictured you wearing the puffy shirt writing this so

Love this piece :)

Seinfeld pirate shirt?

Interesting people don’t talk about “relationships”.

Interesting people don’t talk about “relationships”.

Interesting people don’t talk about “relationships”.

Get a job.

Ironically, this is pretty boring.

this is so good!

wow you are so interesting!!!!!! what a special snowflake!

Thank you for the object lesson in irony!

Congratulations – you’ve reached your goal! You sound not only boring but really annoying!

please for the love of god shut the fuck up

so, i guess im the minority here, but i really, really liked this.

I haven’t read a single sentence of this piece, but I initially read the title as “If We Could Be Boning.” I suspect after reading it I will wish that was the main inquiry here.

Yup.

Ironically this “writers” attempt to be different is down in way that every other “individuals” attempt is made. Therefore this was not bold, innovative, inspiring or interesting.  Imma need Thought Catlog to set up it’s game

Midwestern transplant Brooklyn hipster scum get out of my town.

this is the most boring piece of pretentious drivel IN THE UNIVERSE.

Only a student could write such shit (thought catalog does it again)and think anyone cares.  Or maybe she’s mother fucking Patti Smith. Jesus. Thought Catalog=DO BETTER! STOP PRINTING SUCH BORING SHIT!

Her bio says she “curates moments”. Huhhh?

Aw, people are mean. I think the writing is nice, despite the obvious pretentiousness, and I remember when I felt like this, when I was about 20 or 21. I thought doing drugs and smoking cigarettes and staying up all night talking to people who, at the time seemed like my best friends but who in retrospect I barely knew, was incredibly interesting. You will grow out of it though. I mean, hopefully. Because this is endearing when you’re young, but not so much when you’re 40. Either you’ll grow up and be boring sometimes and happy some of the time, or you’ll spiral into a total waste of space. But don’t worry about that yet. :)

Aw, people are mean. I think the writing is nice, despite the obvious pretentiousness, and I remember when I felt like this, when I was about 20 or 21. I thought doing drugs and smoking cigarettes and staying up all night talking to people who, at the time seemed like my best friends but who in retrospect I barely knew, was incredibly interesting. You will grow out of it though. I mean, hopefully. Because this is endearing when you’re young, but not so much when you’re 40. Either you’ll grow up and be boring sometimes and happy some of the time, or you’ll spiral into a total waste of space. But don’t worry about that yet. :)

Rightamundo. The only reason I still peruse through this site is cause BSG’s stuff is usually interesting.

blllleeeHHHHHHHkkkkgggg–sorry I just retched.

This is the dumbest thing I’ve read on here. And by “here”, I mean the Internet.

To the writer: you should have printed this one out and posted it on your refrigerator for your roommates. Maybe then you would have please a greater percentage of your audience than you pissed off.

sipping apertiffs, talking about relationships, and listening to lo-fi? even smoking cigs!? WOAH! sounds like sheer exhilaration.

however, replace “lo-fi” with Edith Piaf (which is far less banal than lo-fi anyway) and we’re suddenly talking about my 83-year old grandmother and her friends. 

why are there cigarettes in your drinks tho

damn this is really unlikable

the worst part about shit like this is even with all these comments rightfully calling this horrible, it’s totally gonna be lost on the chick who is probably delusional so why bother

Hannah, you’re boring and don’t even realize it.

What do you even know about “Midwestern life”? You should probably just slit your throat before you embarrass yourself any more.

well I hope you find something real then

all girls named hannah are boring

Hannah, you are equally a part of our modern cult of the self as anyone in the suburbs. You live for self-exhaltation and self-importance instead of self-awareness, growth or genuine culture, curiosity or creativity. You have been horribly misled, just as much as the dull philistines living a mechanical live which you use to project your fears about your own inadequacies upon.

Also your prose is wretched and any actual writer or prof would be thrown into fits of giggles if they read this.

I’m flying! I’m flying on this new age wave of pretense. Look at all you — hahahahaahaha — you fucking commoners don’t know what you’re missing. No offense. How could you? You’ve never seen the world from up here. I’m just saying that our collective thoughts are far more productive in the long term to society than you hard-working people who have real jobs.

We think only in the context the past five years — no baggage for us — and we have no need to see beyond our own navels. With our half-cocked smiles, we will bring about this new age revolution. But that’s okay. It’s not to say your life is bad, just that ours is better. More real. You see? No offense. Not trying to be mean.

I’m so high now! The only thing that can bring me back down to earth are those chic half-shaved haircuts, thick rimmed glasses and this line of coke. Oooh you with your PBR. I’m so high! Wouldn’t it be nice to be a real intellectual rather than pretend?

[of shit]

this chick  has a superiority complex because she makes posters on the computer and sees shitty derivative bands and writes poems about cigarettes or something like every other idiot 20 year old?

Yo you are not Andy Warhol you are not part of a ‘scene’ your art is unimportant and will affect nothing and no one. All this shit you do is an exercise in self-importance and a waste of your time and your parents’ money. get a job

ugh. we know, and we feel for you, poor girl. Life is such a chore, when it’s boring….

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXbk3OL-t-s

 You sound like a vacuous bitch.

So what makes you so different from everyone else? This piece obviously failed.  Also, it’s fine to talk about how boring people, but for the love of god..DO NOT LET IT LEAVE YOUR SHITTY APARTMENT!! aka, don’t post it on the internet for millions of readers, especially if you’re not going to tell everyone what is so NOT BORING about you. thanks.

The thing about all the bashing is: will everything a 20 something white person pursuing an art career says end up to be bullshit?  Is it a credibility war?  I’m not saying this is a great piece but should we all abandon enthusiasm for a creative lifestyle?  Or is it nonsense and we should do some other problematic thing like join the peace corps to make use of our lives?

what are you talking about

KILL THE POOR

bridget jones’s diarrhea.

No worries, homegirl.
Survey says: YOU BORING

Can’t tell if the fact that TC’s commenter base devolved into a festering pile of shit within the last year is good or bad for this website

TC commenters remind me of people on myspace in a lot of ways

If anything, shitty articles like these inspire some of the most hilarious comments ever posted on Thought Catalog. kudos to y’all

cool

dammit. was going to rag on you and then i realised we have friends in common.

still, i know you’re young but don’t write things like this on the internet. You’re just asking to be ripped apart. 

this is entirely true. And you will wish you had of spent that time creating and exploring, instead of staying up all night doing drugs and then sleeping your hangover off. 
Whatever you are achieving now you could achieve x3 if you cut the bullshit. 

one day you’re living, eating and breathing unparalleled artistic exploration into the human condition

then the next you’re moving into a house in connecticut or rhode island

ISN’T LIFE SO RANDOM SOMETIMES?!!?

I keep waiting for someone to tell me this is a joke.

Is this a joke?

hahaha

Epic troll

Im gonna give this the benefit of the doubt and assume it’s a put-on (I’m getting old and boring, so my irony detector is a bit worn out). I imagine it’s fairly obvious to anyone who dares pick up a pen or punch a keyboard that the legions of fashionable twentysomething hipster artist are a conformist colony on par with the mythical Midwestern suburbanite. 

You know what wouldn’t be boring? If these self-absorbed kids (because in the end, that’s what they are – and that’s fine, sometimes I kinda wish I was one myself) put down their cigarettes and and Aperol drinks with ice cubes and their shitty lo-fi music and rose up against the plutocracy that is eating up this country’s core. You know, a little revolution against the machine that is making sure that you and yours have a few less scraps with each passing year, and hoping (mostly correctly) that you won’t notice because they’re screwing you casually instead of all at once. Take on that, Hannah. Break some shit. Get your hands dirty. Look at the Midwestern or Rhode Island suburbanite as your ally – because they, like you, are being fucked every day by the oligarchs and their minions in Washington, Brussels and the media establishment – rather than as a cliched foil to rail against. That’s expansion. That’s bravery. That’s creation. Not some twee musings from a navel-gazer. Open your eyes.

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Remember when you were 5? The adults got to stay up late and you could only imagine all the wondrous things that transpired while you were sequestered in your bedroom purgatory? And remember the first time you got to stay up that late and how amazing it felt? How special you suddenly imagined yourself to be? That’s what this piece is about – kids staying up late on their own for the first time.

It may be exciting for a while – killing the evening smoking cigarettes and discussing the latest band – but eventually this too will become routine and boring. What will then become exciting will be developing long-term goals to shoot for. Those goals might include “boring” things like going to bed early or commuting somewhere in the morning, but the successes that come with these will be much more compelling.

I think we all feel as this author does at one point in our lives – at least I hope we get the chance to. Most just don’t make the mistake of stating it so blindly.

Please kill yourself.

My dear, you ARE boring.

Your parents were right… 

Midwest transplant, pretentious, flowery words for no reason…you went to NYU, right?

Thank you, Hannah Daly, for accurately distilling everything I hate about Brooklyn hipsters into just a few awful, awful paragraphs! 

Funniest thing I’ve read today — hilarious. 

oh MAN hannah daly you MUST be soooo embarrassed that gawker ripped you a new one, and now 15,000 people in the tristate area are going to read this abortion. Girl you going to be ridiculed to death every time you say “Hi I’m Hannah Daly!”. as you should.

Anyone else find it fitting that Lena Dunham is in ads all over this page?

“‘If only we could be boring,’ she said, wistfully, smiling in between sips.”

..And that’s when I clicked “close tab”.

Never heard of this irrelevant angst filled individual prior to today, ergo, she is undeniably uninteresting (boring). If she were an interesting individual we would collectively salute her remarkable insight, no?

Dear Hannah –
You do not live in a Dos Equis commercial.
Best of luck in your future.
Thanks.

More startling than the unvarnished contempt and self-regard is the terrible, terrible writing.  

When I’m sitting here, being “boring,” I’m enjoying the fact that while my life my have been “boring” by your standards for the last 3-4 years, I am confident that in that same time you will be back leeching off mommy and daddy in the midwest once your silly little brooklyn hipster streak runs out. You will be taking out the trash after daddy asks you to clean the table, and maybe you’ll consider what could have been.

How immature and pretentious did you feel when writing this, Ms. Daly? By the way what the fuck is “low-fi” and “chillwave?” God just hearing that shit makes me want to punch you in the throat.

I’m guessing you’ve never done a worthwhile thing in your life.

DO IT! PUNCH HER! BKLYN WILL THANK YOU!

No way, she like, went to NYU. That’s like, hard.

what pisses me off, is that this dumb dumpster fire is most likely going to shake her head at all these valid comments and be like “so many angry boring people”. People like her, who are up there own ass, need to stay up there own ass otherwise they’d swallow a barrel

I know this was written by a dumb kid who doesn’t know any better, who hasn’t lived life long enough accrue some self awareness and foresight to know that “in the next decade or so” things will change “so drastically”. Your friends will do “boring” things like get jobs, buy a house and commute to work. It is not a matter of “if” but “when”. But they will also do amazing things like fall in love, get married and raise children, among a myriad other incredible things.

I know all this, yet I can’t resist the urge to tell you to go fuck yourself, hard and not in the good way. Your whole existence gets the gun clap. I hope during one of your cigarette fueled, sweaty all-nighters you wander into Brownsville and get took for mommy and daddy’s cash and credit cards. Oh how magical and not boring it will be!

So I guess I need to grow up a little, just like you, and give you a pass for this tripe.

oh god please punch yourself in the face.

oh god please punch yourself in the face.

My feeling about this, as it sprouts little virus legs and runs all over the internet, is how spectacularly embarrassing all of this will be for the (hopefully) very young writer.  Will Ms. Hannah Daly have to change her name?  Or are there enough glittering, tobacco stained fingered Hannah Daly’s out there that this one might get a pass?  

One tip:  Your unquenchable hunger is unlikely to be quelled by eating packs and packs of cigarettes.  You can always try.  Best of luck with it all, Hannah.  (Don’t take it yourself so seriously – starting. right. now. )  Pax.

I don’t think we’re making fun of her for the experience. It’s her sense of superiority to anyone who isn’t HER that makes this unbearable.

Yes, little Hannah. You are the FIRST 20-something to sit on an NYC fire escape smoking cigarettes and thinking that your life will be epically interesting. This shows not only that you can’t write, but that you don’t read.

*smiles wistfully*

Usually Internet wanking is more clearly labeled…

The only thing more uninteresting than this piece is the thinly veiled anger of some of the commenters. The “you’ll grow out of it, my life is boring so it’s not possible to avoid it” sentiment is very tiresome and just wrong. 

While being young, staying up late, smoking, drugs, etc. are certainly things you can’t make an entire life out of, I think the core sentiment that some people just don’t want a typical “comfortable” stable life is completely valid. Maybe I’m giving the writer too much credit, but there are plenty of people young and old who would hate having that kind of typical midwestern suburban life.

But that being said, the writing *was* really terrible.

I would loooooove it if hannah daly would write a follow up. Like after she read all these super funny comments. If you know her, you should tell her to get on that. When you’ve been publicly bitch slapped like she has, you have to answer to it. And Boogniche i disagree. Those are valid points. And what you say is valid too, it’s just, you don’t need to write an essay about how awsome your life is.

boo

damn you made it past “The ethereal echo of something lo-fi and chillwave set the mood”?

so true. You sound just as bad as a suburban mom who only talks about her trips to whole foods. JUST AS BAD. (coming from someone who actually grew up in NY and sort of hated it/people like you)

 best comment here

Ginsberg is rolling in his grave.

Ginsberg is rolling in his grave.

i’m not even going to draw attention to particularly poor examples of “writing”. you’re the epitome of a wanker, and dead boring to boot.

Aw, it’s okay, you are boring, sweetheart.

 a suburban mother could be far more interesting than you, depending on how she approaches her tasks and carries on with her life. doing “boring things” does not necessarily make a person boring. you are incredibly naive for not realizing this.

please don’t listen to the haters, hannah.  you have a gift for taking even the most mundane party stories and literally turning them into poetry.

and as for barely being able to stand yourself for living a much richer, more deeply meaningful life than most everyone else in the world, hang in there baby.  it’s your cross to bear ;)

vom

The core sentiment IS completely valid; it’s the snobbery and general d-baggery that’s got people down

This is disgusting. You are boring. At first I thought this was satirical like the MGMT song Time to Pretend. It’s not. This girl is serious about her self-importance.

How would ya’ll interpret ole Hannah’s caption to her photo here? http://twitpic.com/5flm2i

To answer your questions in order:
yes
no
yes
yes and no
I hope this was helpful.

To answer your questions in order:
yes
no
yes
yes and no
I hope this was helpful.

This girl needs encouragement about as much as Hitler did.

This girl needs encouragement about as much as Hitler did.

OHHHHHHH so, not only is she this dumb beaver full of herself, she’s also a racist neanderthal. Ok someone really need to slap the shit out of Hannah Daly.

Thanks for helping me to finally realize my life blows because I don’t smoke cigs and make weird art http://bit.ly/owLKQA

What a rube. 

What a rube. 

“nugz” may  refer to “nuggets,” a nickname I often use for cute kids regardless of race.

You know.. I lived in williamsburg for 12 years.
I went to Cooper Union, lived life as an artist/designer, hipster debutante.. fucked the boys in all the coolest bands *before they got famous (of course)
Smoked american spirits, shopped at sunac, drank at daddy, signed with a chelsea gallery, did coke every weekend at Kokies.. when I wasn’t in my studio.

Then I grew up.. got married and moved to OKLAHOMA with my cat and my turtle.. and you know what? Yes. Sometimes I am homesick.. but there is SO MUCH more to life than being “boring” or not..

If that is the only way you can define it then you really have no business claiming anything you do is “creative”.

I’m sorry this post of yours seems to have become a viral shitstorm.. but maybe its time to step back and OPEN your mind a little bit.. if you cant find the “talent” to do that you are probably in the wrong field.

Good luck and I hope you look back on this in a couple years with a healthy dose of light embarassment and laughter…

You know.. I lived in williamsburg for 12 years.
I went to Cooper Union, lived life as an artist/designer, hipster debutante.. fucked the boys in all the coolest bands *before they got famous (of course)
Smoked american spirits, shopped at sunac, drank at daddy, signed with a chelsea gallery, did coke every weekend at Kokies.. when I wasn’t in my studio.

Then I grew up.. got married and moved to OKLAHOMA with my cat and my turtle.. and you know what? Yes. Sometimes I am homesick.. but there is SO MUCH more to life than being “boring” or not..

If that is the only way you can define it then you really have no business claiming anything you do is “creative”.

I’m sorry this post of yours seems to have become a viral shitstorm.. but maybe its time to step back and OPEN your mind a little bit.. if you cant find the “talent” to do that you are probably in the wrong field.

Good luck and I hope you look back on this in a couple years with a healthy dose of light embarassment and laughter…

This was a thoughtfully written comment. I suspect you’re right, if she gives it, like a year, and reads this post again, and the super funny comments below, she’ll get it. She’ll laugh, she’ll be mildly embarrassed. Hell maybe she’ll even right an intelligent “what was I thinking” follow up. It’s just unfortunate that this has gone viral, and that people all over the country are reading this. It’s also REALLY unfortunate that her real name is associated with this, and that Hannah Daly is easy to find on Facebook…

Ms. Daly, sweetie … don’t read this 30 years from now in some fit of reminiscence. This part of your youth, the “I’m the center of the universe and everyone pales in comparison to me and my bitchin’ pals” part, it subsides.

Then watch what happens when you have children. You’ll love a little bit of boring, you’ll kill for an hour of it.

Ah, youth.

I’m a native New Yorker and I dated a girl from the Midwest. She was a professional barrel racer on the rodeo circuit and helped friends and neighbors break horses in her spare time. She was a lot more interesting than some loser smoking off her balcony in BK. This post makes me want to move.

If Sex Could Be Boring

We were fucking in my living room, over poppers
with advil and my ass was on the fire escape.  The sound of
me screaming set the mood.  The heat on my genitals was oppressive and your
finger was ever so slightly in my ass.

“If only sex could be boring” I said as you bit the living shit out of my nipple.
If only.  I added naughtily, ”Seriously, stop it.  It hurts.  Let’s just do missionary.”

If We Could Be Boring

We were working our way down through the strata, vintage shovels pulled from the trunk of our Lambo, our Patek Philippes discarded and sweat staining the collar of your Alex McQueen runway shirt.  The musty smell of dirt, rock, history, time, and bits of plant matter crept past our nostrils as we dug deeper, deeper.

Sometimes the effort seems unescapably too too much.

If only we had a large drill, like they used to dig the Chunnel.
If only we could be boring.

yo are you actually fucking retarded?

Shit just got real.

Hanna – I hate to be the one to tell you this, but we’re way past the point of asking “if you could be boring”! I think you nailed it in one!

Yes, you are a minority of 1 – everybody else thinks this article totally sucks.

Actually, there’s nothing really “amazing” about falling in love, getting married and raising children. Anybody can do those things and unfortunately anybody does. They are about as “amazing” as doing the laundry, commuting to work or any other mundane task that the good and the evil, the beautiful and the hideous, the geniuses and the retarded all do in common.

So not only “if she could be boring” but also “if she could be racist” – apparently, she’s good at both!

Seriously?

It’s pretty damned obvious what “nugz” means – it’s a lame ass White hipster who hates Black people, but is too scared of us to actually say the N word in full, even around little African American children!

“If only we could be boring,” she said, wistfully, smiling in between sips.” How about you curate some better writing. #HackneyWriting

“If only we could be boring,” she said, wistfully, smiling in between sips.” How about you curate some better writing. #HackneyWriting

Is this a joke? She really thinks this? She really committed this to the internet, forever? Maybe she was coming off a meth binge and had just given sloppy oral at The Woods in the back were they throw out the old tacos, and was feeling emboldened.

she probably doesn’t “hate black people” she is definitely a dumb bitch though

Hey dude, maybe don’t “like” every single comment here?  It’s a little weird.

bahahahahahaha

perfect comment

If we could be deboning

We sat crosslegged on the floor of the salon, sipping crisp ice-cold beers and talking over one another, the blow making us hyper-articulate and ensconced in the belief that everything we said was interesting.  Scattered about us were discarded carcassses of red snapper, tilapia, halibut, and the rare corvina.  Totally sated by our fishfeast and cocaine and brilliance, we brought out a massive barracuda – that swift killing machine, inifinite tiny bones framing the delicate flesh within.  We want it!  We want it all!  to taste the barracuda flesh!  to B-E.

Alas, our inane chatter is not tweezers, our delusion is no set of pliers.  the flesh locked forever in its calcide prison.

if only we could be deboning.

Wait, are you fucking in the living room or on the fire escape?

Ass out the window, cheeks squeezing betwixt the grating of the fire escape.  Abdomen in the living room.  Man and lady parts unaccounted-for.

thanks 4 clarifying.  u sound cute

HERE IS HOW YOU CAN STOP BEING BORING- CALL YOUR PARENTS IN THE MIDWEST, TELL THEM THEY DON’T HAVE TO PAY RENT ANY MORE, GET A JOB,  START PAYING FOR THOSE $10 PACKS OF CIGARETTES YOURSELF AND FIND OUT WHAT LIFE IN BROOKLYN IS REALLY LIKE! 

Amen. Also, the Woods is the worst bar, not just in Fantasyland Brooklyn, or all of Brooklyn, or all of New York City, but all of NEW YORK STATE. BURN IT DOWN.

“There is something to those long, sweaty nights, whether we are moving our bodies against each other or eating through packs and packs of cigarettes…” No, no there isn’t anything to your bad dancing and golden house full of beautiful assholes. Nothing, except a bladder infection and H.P.V.

Actually, falling in love IS amazing.   If you’re not feeling that it’s amazing, it probably means that you were not actually in love in the first place.  And getting married and having children is amazing too, if what you found was actually love. 
As for Hannah, she just needs a reality check and needs to grow up a little.  It’s unfortunate that she chose the internet as her avenue for ramblings.

As a boring 20 year old southerner (not quite the midwest, but definitely not brooklyn), I find this a bit silly. First off, most lo-fi and chillwave happens to come from “boring” non-brooklyn folk in their bedrooms who have a lot (arguably too much) time to think about their sound. Completely missing the point perhaps, but I think that speaks for the fact that there is something decent in the slowed-down lifestyle of flyover states. Also I’d prefer to spend my days reading books and drinking/smoking with a solid crew of friends any day over dealing with some of the assumed narcissistic types that prowl brooklyn these days. I’m starting to believe that woody allen is the only good thing to have come out of NY.

Hannah, if you want NOT to be boring, put out that cigarette, climb down the fire escape, and walk about 20 blocks east into the projects and hang out for a while.. 

this made me snort

I assumed from the first sentence that this piece was a satire. Proof that I might have too much faith in this world… Although I also assumed that “glittering people” was a reference to Twilight, which might indicate even worse things about me. At least I’m boring.

she lived in the midwest you dumbass fuck face.

You’re a dumbass fuck face. Do you know what nugget means? Stop being so fucking ignorant and get a life. Stop wasting your time trying to get people’s attention.

Maxwell: you are mistaken. Lots of good things come out of New York. But lots of bad things, like Ms. Daly, come INTO New York.

I would have liked this piece better if it were written “I chain-smoke and drink obscure Italian liqueurs, and that makes me awesome. I don’t want to be like my mom, who has a corporate job and drives a Subaru, and thus sucks.”

Maxwell: you are mistaken. Lots of good things come out of New York. But lots of bad things, like Ms. Daly, come INTO New York.

I would have liked this piece better if it were written “I chain-smoke and drink obscure Italian liqueurs, and that makes me awesome. I don’t want to be like my mom, who has a corporate job and drives a Subaru, and thus sucks.”

HOLD UP. You live “In a golden house full of only beautiful people.” I saw your pic and yikes, you are big boned. I don’t mean fat, I mean your FACE IS HUGE. Like Easter Island Tony Robbins huge. Your glittering housemates know this and snark behind your back. There’s still time to move to Poughkeepsie. I hope this helps. Cheers.

this girl is such a mess with things she CAN help (ie. totally unwarranted elitism).  don’t go bashing her about her looks.  it’s unnecessary and mean.

CD, you are right. My comment was uncalled for. I aimed for jocular (see my handle) and went harsh. Hannah, I apologize.

Ha this is prob that loser Hannah

of course

of course

of course

of course

I’m pretty sure the rehab clinic will recommend the same thing, once she goes through their program to clean the last of the blow out of her system. Because this post is the very definition of drug-fueled fantasies.

Okay, I kind of liked this. I get that its pretentious and condescending at points… but everyone is pretentious and condescending, all the time, so for the collective internet to shit on Hannah because she publishes it on a personal blog is a little hypocritical. Little kids all say they want to be astronauts and we smile and laugh. Hannah says she wants to change the world and you all turn against her. EVERYONE wants or has wanted to change the world? Its not possible for everyone to do so, so we take solace in the small changes we create. There’s no shame in loving your 2.5 children very much and providing for them in a house in Ohio. But everyone does that, so it is by definition average and boring. Is boring bad? No, clearly not. But to be fueled by passion in the way this author and her friends are at least claiming to be doesn’t merit ridicule – perhaps just light rebuke. I have to say, however, the most upsetting thing about reading through these comments is the xenophobia that people from NEW YORK are exhibiting. Who exactly gave you the property rights to Brooklyn? I’d expect people from the most cosmopolitan city in the world to be more tolerant of new transplants… but I guess that’s just my ridiculous, pretentious dream.

hey, maybe you shouldn’t be such a fucking asshole. or, if you don’t like what you are reading, don’t read it. No one is paying you to write articles, because no one cares what you have to say. You just like an ignorant fool…. and probably fat too. 

The comments on this story are very ridiculous, and straight up mean. The motivation behind trying to rip someone apart on the internet who you have never met is truly beyond. Maybe instead of sitting at home, thinking about how you can best attempt to bully someone on the internet, all of you haters should get out of the house, off of your fucking computers, and do something of interest. I tend to frequent blogs a lot, and have rarely seen such immature, and mean-spirited, and straight up bitchy attacks of a total stranger. Of course you have the right to not like Hannah’s article, but why the desire to be so mean? 

It’s people like all of you haters, who openly despise someone without knowing anything about them, that makes living in America such a fucking toxic environment. Grow up, play nice, and respect your neighbors. 

You sound every bit as vainglorious as your friend who wrote this crap. Because people write piffy empty snaps on the internet doesn’t mean american is “a fucking toxic environment”. You sound like a sensitive susan-pussy.

what a loosseerrr

No one is paying you to write articles either you chubby cunt

Why she is an ugly bitch who is horrible at writing

Xenophobia against Brooklyn?  You’re a fucking idiot.

Yes, calling someone a pretentious idiot who is CLEARLY a pretentious idiot is cyberbullying.  I’ve got the waaaaambulance on line #2.

the author of this embarrassing article posted it to a public space expecting reader comments. and comments she got. 

this whole “why doncha’ go out and do somethin’ yerself!” line of argument has
me thinking you are one of hannah’s equally impotent friends going to bat
for her. pathetic.

brilliant

… the borough of Brooklyn did, when I was born here? But I suppose you’d argue that the thousands of dollars your parents have paid every month to subsidize your apartment since you moved here 2 years ago make your “rights” just as valid…

GET. OVER. YOURSELF.

This article was boring.

Instead of “I’m not trying to be mean,” I read this as “It’s just a Jersey thing!”

This is what hipsters actually believe

A scientific breakthrough: discovery of the prototypical manchild.

Sadly to all who believed this was satire, I’ve met this chick quite a few times and had the misfortune of being present at a few of her “curated moments.” Such an epic moment of schadenfreude when I stumbled across this. YES, her and her obedient minions are just as ghastly, self important and utterly delusional as this article. 

went to a party at this girl’s house once, she has the dubious distinction of being Every NYU Girl Who Moved To Williamsburg